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R.J. writes...

A friend of mine admires and identifies with Brooklyn very deeply. So deeply, in fact, that he sometimes wishes he WERE Brooklyn. He's having a rough time right now, and "just be yourself" isn't helping. I was wondering, could the man that understands Brooklyn better than anyone - his creator - give my friend a little encouragement or wisdom? It would mean a lot.

Greg responds...

I'd be happy to, but I'm at a bit of a loss for at least a couple reasons:

1. I have no idea what is troubling your friend or what aspect(s) of Brooklyn he identifies with.

2. I'm not qualified to give advice, and have very little in the way of wisdom, beyond, perhaps, a willingness to admit to my own ignorance.

But encouragement I can do. It may be a bit generic, but I wish your friend the best and suggest he keep trying and seek out help (and even therapy).

Brooklyn is a good guy, who has his troubles. But after 40 years of wandering through the timestream, he did ultimately come back to his clan with a new wisdom of his own and a loving family. So there is hope.

Response recorded on October 14, 2014

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Anonymous writes...

I just realized that the second question I asked two days ago (about how Tom got from Avelon to Manhatten) is REALLY stupid...for some reason I was misremembering the entire situation and was thinking Tom went to Manhatten AFTER Goliath and co. got back from their trip (which makes absolutly no sense now that I remember correctly)...OOPS! Sorry. I'm verry much expecting a "Hey stupid, what the heck are you talking about?!" response to that question.

Anyway, since I don't want to clog the que with just an apology for screwing up a previous one, I'll ask a couple of actual questions too, this time regarding Brooklyn and Katana.

1. You once described their relationship as: "there's conflict." Can you elaborate (in a general sense, not specific situations...ie. they bicker a lot, they disagree on many things, ect.)?

2. I know that the real-world reason for Katana's name is the sward, but in-universe, did her clan use names? (Also, I know it's a "spoiler request," but if you feel like saying who gave her the name if it wasn't her clan, that would be awesome -- same for Foo Dog).

3. Were the parallels between the casts of the World Tour and Timedancer (ie. the lead Gargoyle: Goliath/Brooklyn; his mate: Elisa/Katana; the child: Angela/Nashville; and the beast: Bronx/Foo Dog) a deliberate decision or just a coincidence?

4. Has/will Foo Dog ever had/get a mate?

Greg responds...

1. Watch Sam and Diane on Cheers or Beatrice and Benedick in Much Ado About Nothing.

2. We've established that the Ishimura Clan uses names. Whether they did back then is a SPOILER REQUEST.

3. More organic than anything. Keep in mind, it's just Brooklyn. Then it's Brooklyn, Finella and Mary. Later it's Brooklyn and Fu-Dog. Later still it's Brooklyn, Fu-Dog and Katana. Later still, it's Brooklyn, Fu-Dog, Katana and an egg. Then Brooklyn, Fu-Dog, Katana and Nashville. Then Brooklyn, Fu-Dog, Katana, Nashville and Egwardo. And that's assuming no one else temporarily joins them for some of the Dancing, a fact I'll neither confirm or deny.

4. SPOILER REQUEST.

Response recorded on September 18, 2014

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Anonymous writes...

my question must have gotten deleted last time i asked this, because i cant find it anywhere. it was part of a post with a bunch of questions, but this one is the only one i really want to know about, so i hope this one wasnt the one that made it not go through

after his journey through time, does Brooklyn still consider himself a rookery brother to Lexington and Broadway?
also, since he is a generation older than Goliath, does he still consider himself his rookery son?
would he now technically be a rookery uncle to any or all three of them, and Angela?
if so, how does he view his relationship to Hudson, since they cant technically be rookery brothers? (like cousins mabey?)

Greg responds...

1. Yes.

2. He never did, so no.

3. No.

4. He still sees Hudson as a mentor/father/grandfatherly figure.

Response recorded on September 03, 2014

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Diana writes...

Hey Greg,

it's known, that to control the phoenix gate, one has to think of a special place and time.
Now, that the gate was released by Goliath, one question popped into my head.
Brooklyn couldn't control the gate during his Time Dancer adventures.
But could it be that his subconscious mind influenced the gate's „direction"?
Could the gate (or rather the phoenix) have probably sensed his feelings like fears, inner conflicts or wishes?
Or did the phoenix just follow its own reasons without noticing such things?

By the way … I liked the character of Brooklyn before, but it's due to the Comics (especially Clan building Vol. 2) that he became one of my ultimate favourites. ;)

Greg responds...

Mostly, the Phoenix is the Phoenix. Beyond that, we're talking SPOILER REQUEST. NO COMMENT.

Response recorded on November 15, 2012

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Esteban writes...

Hey Greg, I'm a big fan of Gargoyles and I actually have a question for it concerning Brooklyn. How much has his personality changed after he got back from his Timedancing adventure? I didn't see this question posted at the archives but if you did post it then I apologize.

Greg responds...

He's evolved - and aged - more than he's changed.

Response recorded on August 28, 2012

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gipdac writes...

It's been quite a while since I've written, so here we go.
This may be moot (but hopefully not), but you mentioned you the spinoff comics mini-series you planned to do were Bad Guys then Pendragon then TimeDancer. I had some questions about the potential format for TimeDancer. These are mostly questions about the format of the book (not looking for big plot spoilers):
1) Would TimeDancer have been six issues or more or less?
2) Would the TimeDancer mini-series have picked up were we left Brooklyn in 997 Scotland in #12?
3) Would the TimeDancer mini-series have focused on one or two larger events (meeting Katana or Gnash's birth, etc) or would it have been several smaller events?
4) Again, possibly moot (but hopefully not), after Pendragon and TimeDancer, what would have been next (2198, Dark Ages or New Olympians?)
5) Is there any remote or slight update from Disney or SLG about the potential of more Gargoyles comics?

Greg responds...

1 - 4. lt's all hypothetical now, since we no longer have the license. If and when I get another opportunity, every parameter could be different.

5. I'm afraid not.

Response recorded on July 27, 2012

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Todd Jensen writes...

Recently I noticed that Brooklyn wears an eyepatch over his left eye when he's dressed up as a pirate in "Eye of the Beholder" - and wears one over his left eye for real when he returns from his Timedancing in "Clan-Building". When you worked with the artists on Brooklyn's post-Timedancer look, did you have the Halloween costume in mind? Or is it just a neat coincidence?

Greg responds...

Yes. And that's not all.

Response recorded on February 10, 2012

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Grey Wolf writes...

In as far as Brooklyn traveled into the future, did disco ever come back?

Greg responds...

Yes. And went away again.

Response recorded on July 27, 2011

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Anonymous writes...

Which episode is timedancer?

Greg responds...

I don't understand the question. Check the FAQ. That might help clarify things for you, and if you're still unclear than you can repost the question offering more clarity for me.

Response recorded on May 18, 2011

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Caitlin VW writes...

Hey Greg, first time asking a question. I'm a big fan of the Timedancer series so I've got a question about Katana, Nashville, and Tachi. What are their personalities like? I don't need the general details so a vague anwser or something like that is fine. Thank you.

Greg responds...

I'm not going to reveal this in this forum at this time.

Response recorded on February 09, 2011

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samantha writes...

I checked evry were but i can not find the movie timedancer do you know were i can find the movie.

Greg responds...

There's no TimeDancer movie.

Response recorded on December 03, 2010

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TallHatGentleman writes...

Um, well wow never thought I'd get a chance to ask you one of the questions that been burning my mind for the longest of times. A question that could very well shake the fabric of reality.

Just exactly where did Brooklyn get that wicked Eye patch from in Issue 12 page 24 of Gargoyles the Slave Labor Comics? I'm not asking how he got the wound, but where the Eye patch itself came from? It's just been bugging me for the wildest of times.

Greg responds...

I'm not revealing that at this time.

Response recorded on December 02, 2010

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Vaevictis Asmadi writes...

(Regarding "Phoenix") Greg responds... (to my post a while ago)
<<Showing a second jump would have ruined the shock value of his arrival. Defanged it.
That's not to say I wouldn't eventually like to show ALL his Dance, but that moment of him leaving one era (at the beginning of the Dance) with Finella and Mary and arriving (in another era at the end of his dance) with Katana, Fu-Dog and the kids was ALWAYS my plan since as far back as 1995.>>

You know, I think that _was_ the reason for my thinking about including the start of the second jump. I just don't like huge shocks. Or change. Which is why I'm glad Timedancer was "spoiled" for me. That made the ending significantly less of a Huh? OMG WHAT?!? AAIIEGH!!! moment and more of a "Phew, he only lost an eye. Katana looks cool." moment.

Greg responds...

Uh... I don't know how to respond to this. I love it when there's a huge shock as long as ultimately it MAKES SENSE.

Response recorded on August 31, 2010

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Wolf E. Urameshi writes...

Hello there once again Mr. Weisman, and thanks for your time. I haz a question regarding Timedancer that came to mind while I was reading my Volume 2 of Clan Building: are there more places Brooklyn and company have visited, and more things they have done, than are being told? Or will that be yet another no comment?

Greg responds...

Yes, there's 40 years worth of places and things to tell.

Response recorded on May 25, 2010

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Random Fan writes...

I'm kinda going on a question spree now that I have some down time and this is something else that poped into my head that I haven't seen yet. Are Brooklyn and Katana biologicly the same age when they meet?

Greg responds...

Yes.

Response recorded on March 26, 2010

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Laura 'ad astra' Sack writes...

Quick couple of comments on the recent graphic novels...

It was such a pleasure to read new material and emerse again in the world of gargoyles. I hope we get a chance to do so again quite soon.

Clan Building-
Loved the Star Wars homage cover

I was a little confused by the events with the stone. The explanation helped, but I still liked it.

There is a thread on the Girl-Wonder forums about female characters who look fantastic and none sexualized. Coco met with approval. I'd have to go back and check, but I believe the word was "awesome" :)

I found it odd that the Rosetta Stone was included among the list of stones. Are there legends about the stone? I thought it was just the one in the British Museum. Absolutely loved the "Hey" "Hey" between the stone and grail.

Also surprised by the "Bugger Off". Isn't that rather obscene in the UK? I know the intent to keep the comics as all age friendly as the cartoon has slipped a bit. (Strangely the hand being cut off flew by me (no pun intended). Dingo's mother's death shocked me.) But a substitution phrase would be easier that replacing events. (Of course I am blanking on such a phrase at the moment...unless Sod Off is a smidge more polite. Drop Dead doen't sound particularly British.)

Loved the Timedancer part. Had you always intended to start Time Dancer so soon? Had the cartoon continued on air, would Brooklyn have gone and returned season 3 or did it come sooner in response to the new medium. In general did any events move up for the comics?

I know I am in a minority, but I didn't love the art at the end. It's probably just a question of personal taste. The line was more detailed, but the distortions less to my taste. I've heard some say it looked a little more anime looking, and that only sometimes appeals to me.

The relationship between Gilcomgain and the king was wonderfully creepy.

I would have thought Bodhe to be older than Gilcomgain.

Odd.. in the Gargoyles universe it seems sparing a child's life comes back to haunt you. Bodhe's father did it, Macbeth did it, death, war and heartbreak follow.

As whenever we go back in time in these stories, there is a bittersweetness to it. Most, and most probably all, of the gargoyles we meet will be murdered in the next few years. Especially when we see child gargoyles. (I think, though not prominant, one of the gargoyles we saw smashed was a child.)

"Call me Gnash" :)
"Egwardo" :)!
(I don't remember knowing that was coming, but I may just have missed it.)

Bad Guys
Already mentioned, the murder of Dingo's mother shocked me. As did Tasha's suicide earlier, (though I could see how that might have been finageled into the cartoon). Similarly, when I read over the begining of the trade I realized that we had briefly met Tasha and the others as humans. Even in that little bit it made it all the more poignant. A little thing I noted aside from all the big things others have already noted was how the aligator thug was instinctively hugging and holding the little girl to comfort her. Not just the guy with a gun we met before.

I'm a little tight for time, so I'll just say I really enjoyed it and I felt it was very successful in setting up a new series. Yes it is connected, but in the back of my mind I was expecting it to just be an extension of Gargoyles- a way to see more of that universe and extend the stories we were seeing. Instead this is its own story, in that universe, but its own.

Greg responds...

Rosetta Stone is what it is.

Same with "Bugger Off". Perhaps because my primary audience is in the U.S. it just doesn't feel as dirty as it is.

The start and finish of TimeDancer was always supposed to occur in Season Three of Gargoyles. The forty years in between was always a spin-off idea.

I'm glad that in general you liked the stuff!

Response recorded on March 26, 2010

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Todd Jensen writes...

One of the big changes you made from canon-in-training to canon, in "Clan-Building", was having the Phoenix rather than the Phoenix Gate be the cause of Brooklyn's timedancing. I thought about it recently, and think that it was a good change.

Aside from it providing a good explanation for why it took so long for Brooklyn to get back (it would probably have seem far-fetched if each time the Phoenix Gate appeared during those forty years, he always failed to grab it before it disappeared again), I think it added something to his journey. While we don't know exactly what the Phoenix is as yet, or what its agenda is, the way it was depicted (and Brooklyn's own comments) made it clear that it deliberately took Brooklyn to Scotland in 997, that this was not just some accidental fluke, that the Phoenix has a purpose and intentions like those of any sentient being. Brooklyn isn't being battened about the time-stream by an out of control magical talisman, but is being sent places to fulfill a mission, like Goliath and his companions on the Avalon World Tour. His adventures up and down history, past and future, are the product of a plan, not just the whims of chance. I think it made for a much better story.

Greg responds...

Thanks.

Response recorded on March 12, 2010

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Chip writes...

Some questions bubbled up in my mind while reading Gargoyles Clan-Building, first about the Timedancer arc.
1)Is Fu-Dog’s gold collar affected by the humility spell?

2)Does Katana speak English? I note that she had no lines in “Phoenix” and in the non-canon Radio Play…is the reason she doesn’t speak because she can’t speak English?

3)Somewhat related to question 2, is Brooklyn able to understand the languages of times/places he goes automatically, or does he need to learn them?

Greg responds...

1. It's up to him.

2. She speaks English.

3. I haven't fully decided, but I'm leaning toward the Phoenix compensating magically.

Response recorded on March 05, 2010

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Clark Cradic writes...

Does Brooklyn meet Katana before or after his adventures in the future with Samson and the resistance?

Greg responds...

Both.

Response recorded on February 24, 2010

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Anonymous writes...

In the comics are we ever going to find out what happened to Brooklyn in his 40 years of time travel?

Greg responds...

If I'm given the opportunity, yes.

Response recorded on February 19, 2010

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gipdac writes...

1. When was Katana hatched?
2a. How old is Katana biologically when Brooklyn & Co. return to Manhattan 1996?
2b. How old is Katana chronologically when Brooklyn & Co. return to Manhattan 1996?
3. What year did Katana and Brooklyn first meet?
4. I hope this doesn't sound vulgar because it's not meant to be, but when did Brooklyn and Katana find time to mate with Nashville hanging around? I just imagine lots and lots of awkwardness:-Z

Greg responds...

1. I'm not revealing that at this time.

2a. Same age as Brooklyn.

2b. I'm not revealing that at this time.

3. I'm not revealing that at this time.

4. Parents manage. (Otherwise, I wouldn't have TWO kids myself.)

Response recorded on January 28, 2010

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Vaevictis Asmadi writes...

==== SPOILERS!!!!!============SPOILERS!!!!!========= SPOILERS!!!!!========
TWELVE: PHOENIX

Amusing cover. When I first saw it I wondered what guy had tattooed his face like that. Mother always told you if you make ugly faces, your face could stick that way. Good thing it's only paint, and that hair grows back. Too bad he'll die like that.

The art in the battle scenes is very detailed and good. I love all the different gargoyles. But all the gargs seem to have belly-buttons... I don't think that's right.

That poor gargoyle, Demona's second-in-command, loses his mate. I wish there were enough pages to get to know all these gargoyles. But even without knowing them, it is tragic to see them all die. Tragic, and infuriating to see how genocidal some of the humans are.

And I think Demona blames Brooklyn almost as much as the humans.

That sorcerer, Valmont, got his hand (or both hand?) hacked off, but he got up and just walked away! Yikes!

We get more background about Findlaech and Gillecomgain. It neatly explains why Gillecomgain grew up as a peasant, even though his father is related to Findlaech. This would almost make Gillecomgain's desire to kill Findlaech understandable... almost, if the rain of arrows weren't blindingly obvious to everyone else at the battle. Besides, I can't feel actual sympathy for a guy who so joyfully murders gargoyles. The way he keeps trying to kill little Bodhe doesn't help my impression, either.

I can't help thinking that Demona is rather gullible. She believes Brooklyn when he claims that half of the Gate is enough to control the phoenix... and why should he know she has the Gate, anyway? That was a private moment between her and Goliath. Luckily she falls for it, though.

The ending of this book is a surprise. Not because I didn't know how Timedancer was supposed to finally end. But I expected Brooklyn to freak out and start kissing the ground or hugging people. Plus, I was seriously expecting Coldstone and Coldfire to keep hunting Coldsteel, and for some of the London gargoyles to join the Manhattan Clan. After all, the London Clan is facing severe population pressure, while the Manhattan Clan is way too small.

I am relieved that Brooklyn only lost an eye, instead of an entire limb. An eye I don't mind, but a whole limb would have been disturbing. It is bizarre though, how the Future Tense models keep showing up, first at the Halloween party and now here. How could Puck have predicted these specific outfits? Even if he has the power to see the future, it's quite bizarre that he can see things that specific. Is it just a meta-universe joke?

I like that Katana has a beak, although her face looks kind of squished. I wish more gargoyles had beaks. I like her model.

And they named the egg? That has to be the most pointless... and least gargoylean... thing to do, EVER. Your egg does not need a name! Neither does your sword! Or the sky! Heh. Time to reconnect with your gargoyle roots a little, you three.

I'm actually glad that I read about Timedancer on Ask Greg before reading this comic. I think the whole "40 years, a mate and kid" thing would have been too much of a shock for me otherwise. I tend to be quite averse to change. I also think it might have worked better (if there was room) to show his second jump and one panel of his second destination, to drive home that the Phoenix took him to many times and it was going to be a long trip.

I'm also sad that there wasn't room to show any bits and pieces of Brooklyn's other trips. I would very much like to have seen some of the Ishimura and Xanadu clans, or the Lost Race. Or a glimpse of the future.

I sincerely hope this is not the end. We'll see. Good luck convincing somebody to pick up a graphic novel license some day!
==== SPOILERS!!!!!============SPOILERS!!!!!========= SPOILERS!!!!!========

Greg responds...

Showing a second jump would have ruined the shock value of his arrival. Defanged it.

That's not to say I wouldn't eventually like to show ALL his Dance, but that moment of him leaving one era (at the beginning of the Dance) with Finella and Mary and arriving (in another era at the end of his dance) with Katana, Fu-Dog and the kids was ALWAYS my plan since as far back as 1995.

Response recorded on December 17, 2009

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Cynthia from Riverdale writes...

Dear Greg,
I just finished reading Clan Building Vol. 2 and I wanted to know, will there be more Gargoyle trade paperbacks? I know there is one for Bad Guys coming out, but I wanted to know about stories concerning the main Gargoyles. Also, speaking of Bad Guys, how many issues will be in the trade? Lastly, I thought the trade rushed Brooklyn's time traveling story, will there be a trade paperback to cover what wasn't told? Thanks so much for giving fans the unpublished issues.

Greg responds...

Bad Guys Trade is out. Contains six issues worth of content, including covers.

Brooklyn's story wasn't all that rushed to my mind. IF you're asking about his ENTIRE time-travel journey, then please understand there was NEVER any intent to show all of that here. That story takes place over FORTY YEARS of continuity. I hope to tell more of it eventually, but let's be honest -- there's no way I'm ever going to cover all forty years in my lifetime.

And, yes, I hope there will someday be more Gargoyles trades. Dan Vado and SLG are working on that now.

Response recorded on December 03, 2009

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stanley dean cowens writes...

I reading a question someone asked you about if demona and goliath would ever be a couple again and you said no. I was some what unhappy about that development as I was always had hope they would be a couple again at some point. I also find Elisa to be a some what uninteresting character to be honest compared with demona. I know many shows will take into consideration input from the fanbase and bring certain characters back to life,give popular characters with a small amount of screen time more time and so one. I was wondering if you basically have a vision set in stone for your characters or do you ever make any changes in gargoyles or any other show based on fan feed back? I hope this questions does not violate your rules for answering questions,but I was really wondering about what level you take fan input into consideration regarding existing characters and events? Great show and keep up the good work. I'm kind of burnt out on spiderman to be honest,but now that I know you're involved in it I guess I'll have to buy the box sets and check it out.

Greg responds...

Hmmm... I really don't change stories based on fan desires. First off, fans don't all agree on what they want (for example a lot of folks think Elisa is great), and sometimes (like Demona getting back together with Goliath) they want things that just don't make any story sense and would be bad for the property.

On the other hand, I do respond to what the fans respond to. Brooklyn's popularity was probably one of the things that lead me to the creation of TimeDancer.

Response recorded on September 22, 2009

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G2009 Radio Play

G2009 Radio Play - Act Two

BIG MAN STANDS.

247. NARRATOR
Act Two. The Big Man of Crime enters his offices, but finds he’s not alone…

248. BIG MAN
You spend so much time here, I’ll need to buy you your own chair. So you’ll stay out of mine.

Green Goblin STANDS.

249. GREEN GOBLIN
Surprised to see me?

250. BIG MAN
Not particularly.

251. GREEN GOBLIN
Then you won’t be surprised to learn I’m still running things…

252. BIG MAN
If you can run them from a hospital bed…

253. NARRATOR
Catching Gobby off guard, Lincoln punches him right through the window…

254. GREEN GOBLIN
<impact grunt>

255. NARRATOR
The goblin-glider swoops in and catches the Goblin, who pulls out a Pumpkin Bomb.

PUMPKIN BOMB STANDS.

256. GREEN GOBLIN
Ever the gracious host. And ever the gracious guest, the Goblin must show his appreciation. Here. I brought a gift.

257. NARRATOR
Gobby throws his “gift”, but Goliath swoops in, catches it and throws it back.

Goliath and Spider-Man STAND.

258. PUMPKIN BOMB
<shriek>

259. GREEN GOBLIN
<impact>

260. NARRATOR
Not far away…

261. SPIDER-MAN
No, no, no, no, no… I was hoping I’d never hear that trademark Pumpkin Bomb shriek again…

262. NARRATOR
Spidey swings in to find Goliath and a recovering Gobby together…

263. SPIDER-MAN
So that’s what these gargoyles are… more of the Goblin’s Halloween creations…

264. NARRATOR
Spidey swings into action against Goliath.

265. GOLIATH, SPIDER-MAN
<ad-lib battle sounds>

266. GOLIATH
The Bugle was right about you: you are a threat and a menace!

267. SPIDER-MAN
Wait, you can talk? And read?! And what you read is the Jolly One’s editorials?!

268. GREEN GOBLIN
I know I should assassinate Mr. Lincoln. But I’m so enjoying the show. Really, someone should make more Gargoyles. I know: I’ll call Walt Disney.

Green Goblin, Spider-Man, Goliath, Pumpkin Bomb and Big Man sit. ANGELA, BROOKLYN, BROADWAY and LEXINGTON STAND.

269. NARRATOR
Meanwhile, atop the Eyrie Building, Brooklyn, Lexington and Broadway watch Angela playing with Brooklyn’s son Nashville…

270. ANGELA
That’s great, Nashville. This time try the axe…

271. BROADWAY
Wow, Angela looks so adorable playing with Gnash. I mean, Gnash is cute too…

272. BROOKLYN
Thanks. I know he hatched in another decade, but Katana and I discussed it, and we want the whole clan to be Gnash and Egwardo’s Rookery parents…

273. BROADWAY
We’d be honored…

274. LEXINGTON
I still can’t quite take it all in. I go to Britain for a few weeks, and everything changes…

275. BROADWAY
At least you were gone for weeks. Try adjusting in forty seconds.

276. BROOKLYN
Hey, I had forty years to get ready for this, and it’s still strange…

277. LEXINGTON
But, dude. You’re so… old.

278. BROOKLYN
Thanks.

279. LEXINGTON
Older than Goliath.

280. BROOKLYN
Yeah.

281. LEXINGTON
Almost Hudson’s age.

282. BROOKLYN
I get it. I’m old.

283. LEXINGTON
It’s not that. Everything about you is different.

284. BROOKLYN
Oh, come on…

285. BROADWAY
No, he’s right. The way you talk. The way you move. All those weapons you carry now. It’s like you’ve outgrown us.

286. BROOKLYN
That’s not fair. I can’t tell you how much I missed you both.

287. LEXINGTON
We get that. And we’re not mad. But…

288. BROOKLYN
Look, this isn’t all on me. As I recall, things were already changing. Broadway spent all his time with Angela.

289. BROADWAY
Not all my time.

290. LEXINGTON
Uh… pretty much.

291. BROADWAY
Yeah, well, you’re practically on the internet non-stop.

292. LEXINGTON
It’s addictive! Do you know they have porn on that thing? There’s this one website, Blue Mug Prodâ€"

293. BROOKLYN
I don’t wanna know. The point is we’ve all gone through some changes. That’s just life.

294. BROADWAY
I guess our Three Musketeer days are over…

295. LEXINGTON
Yeah…

Zafiro and Obsidiana STAND.

296. ZAFIRO
Gargoyles of Manhattan!

297. OBSIDIANA
We need you’re help!

298. NARRATOR
At just that moment, the sun rises, turning Brooklyn, Lexington, Broadway, Angela and Gnash to stone. Obsidiana and Zafiro are unaffected, thanks to their mystic Mayan pendants.

299. ZAFIRO
Mierda.

300. OBSIDIANA
Nuestro cronometraje apesta hoy.

Obsidiana, Zafiro, Lexington, Broadway, Brooklyn and Angela sit. Spider-Man, Green Goblin and Pumpkin Bomb STAND.

301. NARRATOR
Across town, Goliath also turns to stone.

302. SPIDER-MAN
What the heck?!

303. GREEN GOBLIN
Well, that was… unexpected.

304. SPIDER-MAN
All right, that’s enough. I know you’re not the real Gobby.

305. GREEN GOBLIN
Yes, yes, “It’s not the voice; it’s the words. Not the tech, but the moves.” I’ve heard it all before…

306. SPIDER-MAN
Then I know exactly who you really are: Chameleon!

307. GREEN GOBLIN
That would ease your conscience, wouldn’t it? To think I’m Chameleon â€" and not the ghost of the man you killed!

308. SPIDER-MAN
I don’t believe in ghosts.

309. GREEN GOBLIN
Then maybe you’d prefer I was the Spawn of Goblin.

310. SPIDER-MAN
Oh, you’d just love to shift the blame to Harry. Sorry, Gobby â€" I mean, Chammy â€" but we’ve been there, done that. Besides, no matter who you are, there hasn’t been time for the Globulin Green to kick in and truly Goblify you. So I’m gonna take you down now while you’re still just a cheap imitation.

311. GREEN GOBLIN
You could do that… or you could save stoneface over there.

312. NARRATOR
Gobby throws a pumpkin bomb at Goliath. Instinctively, Spidey webs it away…

313. PUMPKIN BOMB
<shriek>

Pumpkin Bomb and Green Goblin sit.

314. NARRATOR
By which time, the Goblin is gone, leaving a confused Spidey perched on Goliath’s head…

315. SPIDER-MAN
So in hindsight, I’m thinking maybe you weren’t part of the Gob-Squad, right?
(beat)
Fine. Stonewall me.

May STANDS.

316. NARRATOR
That morning in Forest Hills, Spidey sneaks in through his bedroom window, hoping to catch a few Zs.

317. MAY
Peter, are you awake.

318. PETER
Uh, sure Aunt May. Just getting dressed.

319. MAY
Well, hurry up. I’m… “conferencing” with all the other parents.

Robbie, ROSIE THOMPSON and George STAND.

320. ROBBIE
Are you sure you don’t mind, Mrs. Parker? Cuz I gotta say, what you’re proposing would be my worst nightmare.

321. MAY
<laughs> Oh, I don’t believe that for a minute, Mr. Robertson. It’s a joy to be around Peter and his friends. And I won’t be alone. Anna Watson and Mrs. Osborn will be with me.

322. ROSIE
Emily? She’s so… odd. I don’t think she’s ever said one word to me…

323. MAY
Well, I don’t know her very well, Rosie, but Harry is Peter’s best friend â€" no offense to your Eugene â€" so she must be doing something right.

324. ROSIE
May, you never change. Always seeing the best in people.

325. MAY
I’ll take that as a compliment, dear girl.

326. GEORGE
In any case, I’m glad to get Gwen out of Manhattan for a few days. The streets are looking pretty grim right about now.

327. MAY
Oh, I’m sure your officers will have things under control in no time.

328. PETER
Aunt May, what’s going on?

329. MAY
Oh, didn’t I tell you, Peter. I’m chaperoning your trip to Miami Beach!

330. PETER
Wow. Great.

Peter, May, George, Rosie and Robbie sit. Big Man and Dominique STAND.

331. NARRATOR
Meanwhile, back at L. Thompson Lincoln’s office…

332. BIG MAN
And how can I be of help, Ms. Destine.

333. DOMINIQUE
I think I can help you, Mr. Lincoln.

334. BIG MAN
What makes you think I need any help?

335. DOMINIQUE
Oh, little things. The shattered window, that unusual statue on the ledge outside…

336. BIG MAN
Point taken. How about you cut to the chase?

337. DOMINIQUE
Fine. Tony Dracon. Tomas Brod. Silvio Manfredi. All in jail. Hammerhead. Sable Manfredi. On the run. This gives you a unique opportunity to reclaim what was lost.

338. BIG MAN
I’m sure L. Thompson Lincoln has no idea what you’re talking about. But go on…

339. DOMINIQUE
You have three problems. Green Goblin, Doctor Octopus and the government watching your every move.

340. BIG MAN
And you have the solution…

341. DOMINIQUE
I have the manpower. Three… “super-villains” to take down the competition and Dominic Dracon to use as a figurehead.

342. BIG MAN
The old man? I heard he was shy a few brain cells.

343. DOMINIQUE
It’s easy enough to spread the word he was faking insanity to avoid prosecution. And easy enough to assign him a keeper. Meanwhile, he’s a Dracon. And that name still carries weight, I believe.

344. BIG MAN
It does. But what would you want in exchange?

345. DOMINIQUE
Nothing extraordinary. Just the services of the Tinkerer.

346. BIG MAN
I believe that can be arranged.

347. DOMINIQUE
Lovely. But let’s not allow the moss to gather. You’ll want to move fast. Before the Octopus retrieves his arms…

Dominique and Big Man sit. SILVER SPOON MANAGER, Vulture, DOCTOR OCTOPUS and Electro STAND.

348. NARRATOR
The weather has turned cold. At the Silver Spoon, three men in trench coats and hats wait for their coffee.

349. SILVER SPOON MANAGER
Sixty-nine!

350. VULTURE
Yes. Here.

351. NARRATOR
Vulture sits down with Electro and Doctor Octopus.

352. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
Thank you, Adrian. Now. My arms?

353. VULTURE
In an OsCorp vault.

354. ELECTRO
At Rykers?!

355. VULTURE
<shhhhh> Not THE Vault. A vault. Still very high security, and the police are bound to expect our arrival, but…

356. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
Indeed. <sigh> OsCorp. Even in death, Norman Osborn torments me. But it cannot be helped. I must have my arms. We go in under cover of darkness tonight.

Doctor Octopus, Vulture and Electro sit. Silver Spoon Manager remains standing. Peter and Mary Jane STAND.

357. NARRATOR
The three men exit through one door. Two teenagers enter through another.

358. SILVER SPOON MANAGER
Seventy!

359. MARY JANE
Try to understand, Tiger. I just can’t do that to Gwen. She’s really become my best friend at Midtown.

360. PETER
But it’s not like we’d be making out or anything, right? Uh, right?

361. MARY JANE
Right.

362. PETER
Right, right. We’d be going as friends. Hanging out when the couples were … you know, coupling.

363. MARY JANE
And that would be great. But look at it from her point of view. She took all the risks, and you still wound up with Liz. There’s no way, she’d see me as anything but a threat. Wait, that sounded really conceited.

364. PETER
Have you looked in a mirror? Not conceited. Just fact.

365. MARY JANE
Ooh, nice one. Such a player.

366. PETER
Yeah, right. The world’s loneliest player.

367. MARY JANE
Stop it. I know you don’t want to hurt Gwen either. Not after all the two of you have been through.

368. PETER
Yeah… I wonder if Ms. Brant likes Miami. Kidding, kidding… Wow, pretty good. That was practically the Look.

369. SILVER SPOON MANAGER
Seventy-One!

SEYMOUR O’REILLY stands.

370. PETER
So you’re just not going?

371. MARY JANE
Oh, I’m going. It’s 48 degrees outside and 82 in Miami. I asked Tiny to be my plus one.

372. PETER
Tiny?! Tiny McKeever?! The guy’s got the brain of an amoeba. He makes King Kong look like a genius. Hell, he makes Flash look like Stephen Hawking!

373. MARY JANE
(shrugs)
He’s cute.

374. PETER
<argggh> I just wish I could skip the whole thing. But Aunt May’s going, and after her heart attack, I really think she could use some fun in the sun--

375. SEYMOUR
Sorry to interrupt. Couldn’t help overhearing.

376. PETER
Oh, hey, Seymour.

377. SEYMOUR
Just wanted to let you know Harry invited me too. And I’m totally going stag. I mean who wants a ball and chain when Miami Beach is full of hotties, right?

378. PETER
Uh…

379. SEYMOUR
Just don’t expect to hang out, okay. You’d fully cramp my style.

380. PETER
Of course I would…

381. SILVER SPOON MANAGER
Seventy-two!!

Silver Spoon Manager, Peter, Seymour and Mary Jane sit. Dominique and TINKERER STAND.

382. NARRATOR
Meanwhile, the Tinkerer arrives at the Destine Mansion…

383. DOMINIQUE
You have the devices?

384. TINKERER
Five was all I could put together on short notice. Unless you want to bring Mysterio in…?

385. DOMINIQUE
Our stage is crowded enough. And five should do quite nicely.

Dominique and Tinkerer sit. May, Mary Jane, GREG BISHANSKY, Sally, Gwen, Harry, Kong, Rand, Flash, Liz, Jason, Peter and Seymour STAND.

386. NARRATOR
Later that afternoon, Harry’s rented a party bus, and the gang is en route to the airport, stuck in heavy traffic on the expressway. A very prepared May Parker has a clipboard…

387. MAY
All right, we have three adults and sixteen children â€" sorry, sixteen teenagers. That’s nineteen sojourners bound for Florida. So why did my headcount come to twenty?

388. MARY JANE
I think you counted the bus driver, Mrs. Parker.

389. MAY
Oh, that I did.

390. BISHANSKY
Hey, twist my arm! I’ll go to Miami with you guys!!

391. SALLY
Was anyone talking to you?

392. BISHANSKY
Uh… no.

393. SALLY
Then eyes front.

394. BISHANSKY
Eyes front.

395. GWEN
Harry, are you all right?

396. HARRY
I dunno. All this stopping and starting. My stomach’s a little queasy…

397. KONG
Dude. Does this bus rock or what?!

398. RAND
‘Scool.

399. FLASH
Damn right it’s cool. Wouldn’t mind taking this baby all the way to Florida.

400. SALLY
Excuse me?! It’s a bus.

401. LIZ
Sally’s right. We’re not ditching the private jet for a bus. Right, Jason?

402. JASON
Uh…

403. SALLY
Right.

404. PETER
It really is a very nice bus though.

405. BISHANSKY
Hey, I’m not offended. I still can’t believe the Osborns hired me again. The last time, I got in two-- <impact grunt>

406. SEYMOUR
Dude, you totally rear-ended that guy at the tollbooth!

407. BISHANSKY
Not again…

408. SALLY
Wonderful. Now, we’ll be stuck here forever!

409. MAY
Everybody stay calm.

410. HARRY
Ah, man, gotta use the john…

411. KONG
<laughs> I think Osborn’s gonna hurl!

412. SALLY
Oh. My. God! If my hair starts smelling like vomit, I’ll sue you for bus-driver malpractice!!

413. BISHANSKY
Sorry, sorry…

Bishansky, Sally, Kong, Harry, May, Seymour, Peter, Jason, Liz, Flash, Rand, Gwen and Mary Jane sit. Brooklyn, Lexington, Broadway, Zafiro and Obsidiana STAND.

414. NARRATOR
The sun sets. At the castle, the gargoyles awaken…

415. BROOKLYN, BROADWAY, LEXINGTON
<awakening roars>

416. BROOKLYN
You must be Zafiro.

417. ZAFIRO
How did you know?

418. BROOKLYN
Strong family resemblance.

419. ZAFIRO
¿Perdón?

420. BROOKLYN
Long story. Time travel. The future. A whole other spin-off. Two actually…

421. OBSIDIANA
We don’t have time for your “spin-offs”. ¿Donde esta Goliath?

422. BROADWAY
He didn’t sleep here.

423. LEXINGTON
But I’m sure he’ll be back soon.

Elisa STANDS.

424. ELISA
He’d better. We have trouble. Demona trouble.

425. OBSIDIANA
Elisa!

426. ELISA
Hi, Obsidiana. I’m betting you have trouble too…

Elisa, Obsidiana, Lexington, Broadway, Brooklyn and Zafiro sit. Kraven, Calypso, Curt and Gulyadkin STAND.

427. NARRATOR
And while the clan awaits Goliath’s return…

428. KRAVEN
It is time, Calypso.

429. CALYPSO
Yes. The forces gather. We can make this one our own.

430. CURT
I demand you let me go!

431. KRAVEN
Hold your tongue, American dog. Or Gulyadkin will hold it for you.

432. GULYADKIN
<low lion growl>

433. CALYPSO
Calm yourself… This change will not be difficult. The primitive bound within is barely skin-deep…

434. CURT
I-- I don’t know what you’re talking about.

435. CALYPSO
I think you do. You see my companion. The details may have been created in a laboratory…

436. KRAVEN
But the soul of the Hunter â€" the beast inside â€" was always my own.

437. CURT
What are doing with that doll?

438. CALYPSO
Turning it inside out.

439. CURT
Listen to me, please. Even if you can release the “beast inside”, you don’t want to! It can’t be controlled.

440. KRAVEN
<laughs> Nyet. Not by you perhaps. But my Calypso is not so easily trifled with.

441. CALYPSO
It is time…

442. CURT
Noooo!!!! <transformation scream>

443. NARRATOR
Curt Connors is transformed by Calypso’s magic into the Lizard.

444. LIZARD
<roar>

445. KRAVEN
Now… to the Hunt!

Kraven, LIZARD, Calypso and Gulyadkin sit. Obsidiana, Zafiro, Angela, Elisa, Goliath, Broadway and Brooklyn STAND.

446. NARRATOR
Back at the Castle, Goliath has returned, and the entire clan has gathered. Elisa’s revealed what she knows about Demona. Now, it’s Obsidiana’s turn…

447. OBSIDIANA
It came from somewhere further south. Two human smugglers carrying an object of great power through the Green…

448. ZAFIRO
My mate is sensitive to these things. We tracked them, but they boarded a jet airplane and were soon out of our reach.

449. OBSIDIANA
Pero still I could sense great forces gathering. I asked Jade and Turquesa to teach us the way to Avalon…

450. ZAFIRO
Gabriel says hello, by the way.

451. ANGELA
Oh, I miss him. How is he?

452. ELISA
Angela, honey, let’s stay on point. I take it Avalon sent you here.

453. OBSIDIANA
Yes. We nearly achieved the totem, but a ridiculous human dressed in red and blueâ€"

454. ELISA, GOLIATH (UNISON)
Spider-Man…

455. OBSIDIANA
He did spin webs like a spider. Though from his hands, not hisâ€"

456. ZAFIRO
Focus, mi amor.

457. OBSIDIANA
Lo siento. This Man-Spider, he interfered. The smugglers escaped again. Now, power builds on power, rising to a crescendo.

458. BROADWAY
And that’s bad, right?

459. NARRATOR
Elisa’s cellphone rings.

Matt STANDS.

460. ELISA
Maza.

461. MATT
It’s Matt. Something’s going down at the OsCorp vault off the Expressway. Most of the Taskforce is already here. Stacy and his men too. But I’m thinking we might need… “back-up”. Lots and lots of back-up.

462. ELISA
We’re on our way. Brooklyn, can Bronx and Fu-Dog baby-sit Egwardo?

463. BROOKLYN
Of course.

464. ELISA
Good. Because otherwise it’s all hands on deck.

Elisa, Brooklyn, Broadway, Obsidiana, Zafiro, Goliath and Angela sit. George, Morgan and O’Neil STAND.

465. MATT
Okay, Captain. The rest of the Taskforce is on its way.

466. GEORGE
My men are deployed.

467. O’NEIL
And just in time! Cuz we got Gobby and his Pumpkin-Heads at 12 o’clock!

Green Goblin and Pumpkin Bomb STAND.

468. GREEN GOBLIN
Playtime!

469. PUMPKIN BOMB
<shriek>

470. MORGAN
And a gargoyle at 3 o’clock!

471. GEORGE
That’s not a gargoyle. That’s the Vulture!

Vulture STANDS.

472. VULTURE
You were right, Otto. The police were waiting. And the Goblin is here too. You don’t think it could actually be Osborn, still alive, do you?

Doctor Octopus and Electro STAND.

473. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
Do not get distracted by old grudges, Adrian. It hardly matters who wears the Green. His intent is still to prevent me from regaining my arms. You must keep the Goblin and the authorities occupied.

474. VULTURE
Of course.

475. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
Now, Electro. Open the vault.

476. ELECTRO
Roger that, Doc!

477. NARRATOR
Electro, already inside, short-circuits the vault’s electro-magnetic lock.

Tinkerer and Demona STAND.

478. TINKERER
Electro’s breached the vault.

479. DEMONA
So predictable. Send in your operatives.

480. NARRATOR
Tinkerer opens a burlap sack, releasing his five “operatives”.

HOMUNCULUS #1, HOMUNCULUS #2, HOMUNCULUS #3, HOMUNCULUS #4 and HOMUNCULUS #5 STAND.

481. HOMUNCULUS #1
Homunculi to the rescue!

482. HOMUNCULUS #2
Dirty work to be done!

483. HOMUNCULUS #3
Peach Cobbler!

484. HOMUNCULUS #4
Uh oh, somebody’s language system’s off-line again.

485. HOMUNCULUS #5
You know it, girlfriend!

Calypso, Kraven and Lizard STAND.

486. NARRATOR
And down in the sewer…

487. CALYPSO
It is right above us, my love. The Power and the Glory. The very keys to the Kingdom.

488. KRAVEN
And Kraven will lay them all at your feet.

489. LIZARD
<lizard roar>

490. NARRATOR
Up top, a stretch limo skids to a stop outside the vault. Dominic Dracon and Fancy Dan emerge.

Dracon and FANCY DAN STAND.

491. DRACON
All right, boys. Get me those jewels!

492. FANCY DAN
I think what the boss means is… Destroy the competition!

Carnage, Colonel Jupiter and Venom STAND.

493. CARNAGE
<evil chuckle> Carnage time?

494. FANCY DAN
Yeah. Go. Kill. Whatever.

495. COLONEL JUPITER
Colonel Jupiter will stop the Green Goblin and Vulture in their tracks!

496. FANCY DAN
Knock yourself out. But what are you waiting for?

497. VENOM
Someone worthy of our hate. But we have faith… He’ll come…

498. GREEN GOBLIN
My, my, the field’s getting crowded. Let’s thin the herd. Pumpkin-Heads, release the hounds! <ahem> That was a metaphor. Throw your pumpkin bombs already!

499. PUMPKIN BOMB
<multiple shrieks>

Pumpkin Bomb, Green Goblin, Venom, Fancy Dan, Colonel Jupiter, Carnage, Dracon, Lizard, Kraven, Calypso, Homunculus #5, Homunculus #4, Homunculus #3, Homunculus #2, Homunculus #1, Demona, Tinkerer, Electro, Doctor Octopus, Vulture, George, Morgan, O’Neil and Matt SIT. May, Peter, Bishansky, Flash, Kong, Sally, Mary Jane, Gwen and Harry STAND.

500. MAY
Goodness, what was that?

501. PETER
Something The Bugle will want pictures of. Open the door.

502. BISHANSKY
Uh…

503. MAY
Peter Parker, I am not letting you off this bus in the middle of the expressway.

504. PETER
Aunt May we’re at a complete standstill. And you don’t have to worry. I’ll use my telephoto lens. I won’t be anywhere near the action.

505. MAY
I suppose it is your job… Open the door.

506. BISHANSKY
Yes, ma’am.

507. PETER
Thanks, Aunt May. You rock!

508. FLASH
If Puny Parker’s going, I’m going too!

509. MAY
Eugene Thompson, you sit your backside down in that seat right this minute.

510. FLASH
Yes, ma’am.

511. KONG
<laughs>

512. SALLY
What’s he going to take pictures with? I saw his camera get blown up two months ago.

513. MARY JANE
Pete’s a professional photographer, Sally. I’m sure he has more than one camera.

514. GWEN
Harry… Are you all right in there?

515. HARRY
<vomit noise> Ugh, don’t come in. It really isn’t pretty.

Harry, Gwen, Mary Jane, Sally, Kong, Flash, May, Peter and Bishansky sit. Broadway, Goliath, Brooklyn, Angela, Elisa, Zafiro and Obsidiana STAND.

516. NARRATOR
The clan alights on a rise overlooking the battlefield.

517. BROADWAY
Whoa, what a mess…

518. GOLIATH
We will split our forces. Brooklyn, Lexington, Broadway, Obsidiana, Zafiro with me.

519. BROOKLYN
Shouldn’t I lead the other contingent?

520. GOLIATH
I need your experience and your weapons at my side.

521. ANGELA
Don’t worry, Brooklyn, we’ve got it covered.

522. NARRATOR
Angela, Hudson, Katana, Gnash, Coldstone and Coldfire glide toward the battle.

523. BROOKLYN, BROADWAY (UNISON)
Be careful!

Angela sits.

524. ELISA
You know I’m going with you.

525. GOLIATH
Not this time, Elisa. You must join your fellow officers…

526. ELISA
Butâ€"

527. GOLIATH
When all is settled, we shall need your help to cover our retreat from this conflagration… You know this is true.

528. ELISA
(defeated)
Yes.

Elisa sits. Spider-Man STANDS.

529. NARRATOR
Elisa makes her way down the hill. Goliath and the others glide to the Vault’s roof. Spider-Man lands there at the same time.

530. SPIDER-MAN, ZAFIRO (UNISON)
You again!

531. GOLIATH
Hold, Spider-Man. I have a friend who knows your Captain Stacy.

532. SPIDER-MAN
Really?

533. GOLIATH
This policeman believes in you. So I choose to believe in you as well.

534. SPIDER-MAN
Says the eight-foot tall medieval monster. But I get it. We’re on the same side. So let’s go kick some Pumpkin-Butt!

535. ZAFIRO
¡Idiota! That battle is a mere distraction.

536. OBSIDIANA
The true danger lies within…

537. SPIDER-MAN
All right, all right, you had me at “Idiota”.

538. NARRATOR
The gargoyles rip open the rooftop. The seven heroes descend, but someone watches…

Spider-Man, Obsidiana, Zafiro, Goliath, Broadway and Brooklyn sit. Venom and Fancy Dan STAND.

539. VENOM
And there goes our Bro…

540. FANCY DAN
You going in? That wasn’t the plan!

541. VENOM
And how do intend to stop us?

542. FANCY DAN
Fine, go. But if you see my Ricochet suit, bring it out!

Fancy Dan and Venom sit. Foswell, Jonah and Robbie STAND.

543. FOSWELL
See, J.J. The tip from Dracon’s old chauffer was right on the money.

544. JONAH
Whaddaya want, a fershlugginer medal?! Let’s get in there!

545. ROBBIE
Slow down, Jonah. I promised Joan I wouldn’t let you lose your head, figuratively or literally.

546. JONAH
Forget my head! Who cares about my head?! My boy needs me!

Ned and Colonel Jupiter STAND.

547. NED
Looks to me like your boy’s doing pretty well, Chief!

548. COLONEL JUPITER
Take that, miscreants!

549. ROBBIE
Ned, how did youâ€"

550. NED
Tip from one of the pumpkin-heads. Foswell’s not the only one with sources.

551. JONAH
You two can naked mud-wrestle over who’s the biggest brown-noser later. For now, Robbie, if you don’t let go of me in zero-point-zero seconds, I’ll dropkick you to next Season! And there’s no guarantee there’ll be a next Season!

552. NARRATOR
Jonah breaks away from Robbie, but his path is blocked…

Elisa STANDS.

553. ELISA
Get back! You want to wind up street pizza!

554. JONAH
But that’s my son up there.

555. ELISA
Yeah, well, at least he’s fighting on the right side.

556. COLONEL JUPITER
Nothing stands against the might of Colonel Jupiter!

557. ELISA
Does he always talk like that?

558. ROBBIE
Bombasticism runs in the family.

Robbie, Elisa, Colonel Jupiter, Jonah, Ned and Foswell sit. Vulture, Carnage, Green Goblin, Angela, Fancy Dan, Matt and Dracon STAND.

559. NARRATOR
Jupiter takes down Pumpkin-Heads right and left. Hudson squares off against Vulture.

560. VULTURE
Why do I get the old guy?

561. NARRATOR
You’re old. He’s old. It’s parallelism. Get over it.
(beat)
Coldstone and Coldfire isolate Carnage.

562. CARNAGE
No fair! These two don’t spatter at all!

563. NARRATOR
Angela and Katana take on the Goblin.

564. GREEN GOBLIN
Oh, goody. Gobby likes getting down and dirty with the hotties.

565. ANGELA
Oh, you did not just say that.

566. NARRATOR
And little Gnash goes after Fancy Dan.

567. FANCY DAN
Admit it, you gave me the kid because I’m short?

568. NARRATOR
Even Detective Bluestone gets into the act.

569. MATT
Freeze, Dracon!

570. DRACON
You’re confused. I’m G.F. Benton, a certified public accountant. I think I’ll be going now…

571. MATT
Yeah. Back to Ravencroft, you old nutter!

572. NARRATOR
But inside, things are a bit more serious…

Matt, Dracon, Fancy Dan, Angela, Green Goblin, Carnage and Vulture sit. Electro and Doctor Octopus STAND.

573. ELECTRO
Got your arms, Doc!

574. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
And my Megalo-Pack?

575. ELECTRO
You’re Mega-what now?

576. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
My power-source, Maxwell.

577. ELECTRO
Right, right. No. That’s not here.

578. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
What?!

Homunculus #1, Homunculus #2 and Homunculus #3 STAND.

579. HOMUNCULUS #1
Gotta get the true treasure!

580. HOMUNCULUS #2
Bring it back to the big Smurfette!

581. HOMUNCULUS #3
Blunk hates getting wet!

582. NARRATOR
Three Homunculi fly deeper into the vault to retrieve Demona’s prize.

Homunculus #3, Homunculus #2 and Homunculus #1 sit. Zafiro, Spider-Man, Lexington, Homunculus #5, Goliath, Brooklyn, Broadway and Obsidiana STAND.

583. ZAFIRO
What are those things?!

584. SPIDER-MAN, LEXINGTON (UNISON)
Robots!

585. LEXINGTON
And I got one!

586. HOMUNCULUS #5
Leggo, you big bully!

587. LEXINGTON
<ugh> What an annoying voice…

588. HOMUNCULUS #5
(aside to audience)
Look who’s talking.

589. LEXINGTON
…But I might be able to use it to take control of the others.

590. SPIDER-MAN
I think I can help.

Venom STANDS.

591. VENOM
You’ll be a little too busy for that, Bro.

592. GOLIATH
Friend of yours?

593. SPIDER-MAN
Once upon a time. Not so much now.

594. VENOM
Die, Spider-Man!

595. VENOM, SPIDER-MAN
<add-lib battle sounds>

596. SPIDER-MAN
A little help?

597. NARRATOR
Brooklyn blasts Venom, who collapses.

598. VENOM
<vibrating scream>

Venom sits.

599. BROOKLYN
Sonic Cannon. Circa 2198. Guess my weapons do come in handy.

600. LEXINGTON
Just cover me until I can get this working…

Demona and Tinkerer STAND.

601. DEMONA
What’s wrong, Tinkerer? Why haven’t they returned?

602. TINKERER
Someone’s trying to counter their programming. He won’t succeed.

603. DEMONA
He had better not.

604. LEXINGTON
My hack’s being hacked!

605. TINKERER
He’s overriding my override!

Homunculus #4 STANDS.

606. HOMUNCULUS #4
Go right. Go left. Go right. Go left. Blow up!

607. NARRATOR
Homunculus #4 blows up. But so does Homunculus #5 in Lexington’s hands!

608. LEXINGTON
<pain cry>

609. BROADWAY
Lexington!

Homunculus #4 and Homunculus #5 sit.

610. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
This is madness! Grab my arms and get me out of here!

611. ELECTRO
Workin’ on it!

612. NARRATOR
Electro blasts away, until he and Doc Ock are blindsided by…

Kraven, Gulyadkin, Lizard and Calypso STAND.

613. ELECTRO, DOCTOR OCTOPUS
<impacts>

614. BROADWAY
Look, it’s Claw.

615. KRAVEN
<roar>

616. BROOKLYN
That’s not Claw.

617. BROADWAY
Well, it’s sure not Maggie.

618. GULYADKIN
<lion roar>

619. LEXINGTON
(recovering)
Is that an actual lion?

620. LIZARD
<lizard roar>

621. SPIDER-MAN
Lizard, too? Seriously, this is way over the top.
Homunculus #1 and Homunculus #2 STAND.

622. HOMUNCULUS #1
Got the gizmo!

623. HOMUNCULUS #2
Homunculi never fail!

624. NARRATOR
Two homunculi fly past, carrying a sealed container down a dark corridor.

625. CALYPSO, OBSIDIANA (UNISON)
The totem!
(pointing at each other)
Don’t let her near it!

626. KRAVEN
Go, Calypso! Leave them to us!

627. ZAFIRO
¡Vaya, mi amor!

628. BROOKLYN
We got your back, Goliath! Go!

629. SPIDER-MAN
Think I’ll tag along too…

Spider-Man, Obsidiana, Calypso, Homunculus #2, Homunculus #1, Goliath, Tinkerer and Demona sit.

630. NARRATOR
Calypso, Obsidiana, Goliath and Spider-Man race down the corridor.

631. KRAVEN
Lizard, take the reptile!

632. ZAFIRO
¡No soy ningún reptil! ¡Soy un Gárgolo!

633. ZAFIRO, LIZARD
<ad-lib battle sounds>

634. KRAVEN
Gulyadkin attack!

635. GULYADKIN
<pounce roar>

636. NARRATOR
Gulyadkin and Kraven attack Lex and Broadway!

637. LEXINGTON
Hey, get him off me!

638. BROADWAY
Kinda busy at the moment!

639. GULYADKIN, LEXINGTON, KRAVEN, BROADWAY
<ad-lib struggles>

640. NARRATOR
Brooklyn steps in and pulls both cats off his rookery brothers. They turn on him.

641. BROOKLYN
Uh oh.

642. BROADWAY, LEXINGTON (UNISON)
All for one!

643. NARRATOR
The two gargoyles return the favor, knocking Kraven and Gulyadkin aside. Then Brooklyn blasts them both.

644. BROOKLYN
And one for all!

645. KRAVEN, GULYADKIN
<blast impacts>

646. LEXINGTON
Some things never change.

647. NARRATOR
Zafiro throws Lizard’s unconscious body on top of Kraven…

648. KRAVEN, LIZARD
<oofs>

649. ZAFIRO
We should follow Obsidiana…

650. ZAFIRO, BROOKLYN, LEXINGTON, BROADWAY
<electrocution scream>

651. NARRATOR
The four gargoyles are dropped by Electro’s blast.

652. ELECTRO
Still want out?

653. DOCTOR OCTOPUS
Indeed not. My curiosity is piqued. Let’s see where this leads…

Doctor Octopus, Electro, Broadway, Lexington, Brooklyn, Zafiro, Gulyadkin, Kraven and Lizard sit. Demona, Homunculus #1 and Homunculus #2 STAND.

654. NARRATOR
Electro and Octopus head down the corridor… In a dimly lit room, Demona holds the Spear of Destiny and watches as the two homunculi open the container. Inside… is a crown of thorns.

655. DEMONA
The Crown of Thorns!

656. NARRATOR
Demona removes her tiara.

657. DEMONA
Place it on my head…

658. HOMUNCULUS #1
Placing, placing…

659. HOMUNCULUS #2
Homunculi aim to please!

660. NARRATOR
The Homunculi gently lower the crown onto Demona’s head before disappearing back into the darkness. The thorns bite into her brow, drawing blood. Calypso, Obsidiana, Goliath and Spidey come rushing in.

Homunculus #2 and Homunculus #1 sit. Spider-Man, Goliath, Calypso and Obsidiana STAND.

661. DEMONA
My Kingdom come. My Will be done…

662. SPIDER-MAN
Friend of yours?

663. GOLIATH
Once upon a time. Not so much now.

664. DEMONA
On Earth as it is in Heaven…

665. CALYPSO
Too late…

666. OBSIDIANA
Too late…

667. DEMONA
For MINE is the Kingdom and the Power and the Glory for ever and ever…

668. CALYPSO, OBSIDIANA, SPIDER-MAN (UNISON)
Amen…

669. NARRATOR
Light radiates outward from the Spear. Goliath watches in confusion as Calypso, Obsidiana and Spider-Man drop to their knees before Demona. Octopus and Electro enter and likewise fall to their knees. The light reaches the outer vault. Though still unconscious, Venom, Lizard, Zafiro and Kraven lurch to their feet, then drop to their knees. And still the light advances…

Obsidiana and Calypso sit.

670. GOLIATH
What sorcery is this?!

671. DEMONA
The most powerful human sorcery ever created, Goliath. This is humanity’s Armageddon. Their entire race’s final act.

END ACT TWO

NEXT: ACT THREE...



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