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G2009 Radio Play - Act One
The Spectacular Spider-Man Meets Gargoyles. RELIGIOUS STUDIES 101: A HANDFUL OF THORNS. Act One. Late that night atop the Eyrie Buildingâ¦
Dominique and Kafka sit. GOLIATH and ELISA MAZA STAND and KISS.
5. GOLIATH, ELISA
There are some human customs I will never get used to Elisa. <kisses her again> This is not one of them.
Youâre in a good mood.
I am. Hudson and Lexington are back from Europe, bringing Coldstone and Coldfire with them.
<chuckle> Not to mention Brooklyn returning from forty years of TimeDancing with a mate, a son, a beast and an egg.
The clan has doubled in size. What challenge can the Fates throw at us now that we cannotâ"
The sun rises. Goliath turns to stone.
<groan> You just had to say that out loud, didnât you?
Elisa and Goliath sit. MAY PARKER and PETER PARKER STAND.
Meanwhile, in Forest Hillsâ¦
Peter, what are you doing up?
Studying for todayâs English final. Itâs on Midsummer Nightâs Dream. And I missed seeing the Cliff Notes version.
Which may explain why you and Miss Allan are no longer a couple.
Aunt May, you know we didnât break up because I missed her play.
Youâre right; I shouldnât be glib. I suppose thereâs no chance that you and Gwenâ¦
I donât know. Not now anyway. Not when Harryâs hurting so much from the death of his father.
It hardly seems possible that Norman Osborn is gone. The Bugle says he was the Green Goblin, but Iâm not sure I can believe that.
Sometimes, Aunt Mayâ¦ itâs, okay, to believe everything you readâ¦
May and Peter sit. GREEN GOBLIN and BLACKIE GAXTON STAND.
At a dive bar downtown, the Green Goblin BURSTS in on his gliderâ¦
23. GREEN GOBLIN
<tsk, tsk, tsk> Blackie. This place is scummy even by your pond-scum standards. Quite a comedown from your last gigâ¦
Tell that to the whacko who set a flaming super-villain loose in The Big Sky. Oh, wait. That was you.
25. GREEN GOBLIN
Yes. Yes, it was. <maniacal laugh>
Werenât you supposed to be dead?
27. GREEN GOBLIN
I was also supposed to be Osborn, but you didnât buy that, did you? Just one of the many little tricks I keep up my sleeve. Nothingâs changed, Blackie. The Goblinâs still in charge.
You hear me arguing?
29. GREEN GOBLIN
No. Now, gather my Pumpkin-Headsâ¦
Blackie and Goblin sit. Kafka and Dominique STAND.
At Ravencroft, Dominique Destine and Dr. Kafka supervises six inmates who work to excavate a sub-basement.
I still donât understand what you expect to find down here.
Vertros Ravencroft, the founder of this Institute, was a quirky soul. An intimate friend of Freud and Conan Doyle, he was a true believer in both psychotherapy and spiritualism.
You speak as if you knew him.
Now how would that be possible?
It couldnât, of courseâ¦ But the dig?
Yes. Ravencroft was also a collector. I have reason to believe he buried certain items of his collection here. Now, Doctor, didnât you say you had meetings scheduledâ¦
Youâll be all right down here alone?
Your orderlies are in the hallway. And Iâm quite self-sufficient. So run along.
Kafka sits. OTTO OCTAVIUS STANDS.
Excellent work, Doctor Octavius. Very precise.
Thank you. I appreciate having something to occupy my handsâ¦
Your hands? Notâ¦ your arms?
Arms? Iâ¦ I hope youâre not referring to my unfortunateâ¦ b-b-breakdown.
What would be the point? Believe me, Doctor, no one better understands the advantage of creating a false front.
Iâve blasted away another section of cement.
Thank you, Maxwell.
Donât. Call. Me. That.
Donât. Tell. Me. What to doâ¦ Electro.
(asides to Otto)
Sheâs a little scary.
Otto and Electro sit. DOMINIC DRACON, JOHN JAMESON, EDDIE BROCK and CLETUS KASSADY STAND.
I blame Mace. When that crook cheated me, I lost face. But when I get the jewels back, theyâll respect me again. Did Mace bury the jewels here?
Maybe he did, Dominic. Keep working.
Whatâs the point? How is tearing up a basement supposed to bring me Colonel Jupiterâs power?!
Shut up and dig.
You like doing this?!
I hate it. But I need that hate. I need to keep the hate alive.
Such an interesting crew. And what do you want out of life, Cletusâ¦
Nothing too fancy. <chuckles> Just a little carnage.
Cletus, Dominique, Eddie, John and Dracon sit. GWEN STACY and Peter STAND.
That afternoon, at Midtown Highâ¦
Hey, Pete. Howâd you do?
Ugh, horrible, probably. I mean you know English is like my worst subject. Itâs all so subjective andâ"
Okay, okayâ¦ not the look! I probably aced it. Happy?
That you did well. Always.
Thanks. Look, Gwen, I--
HARRY OSBORN STANDS.
Well, what have we here? My best friend and girlfriend conferring in a corner. Planning a surprise party for me?
Uh, itâs not your birthday, Harr.
I thought maybe it was a thank you bash. For giving you both theseâ¦
âYou are cordially invited to spend Spring Break traveling by private jet to Miami, where youâll stay, all-expenses-paid, at the Osborn Winter Compound on the Beachâ¦"
Youâre inviting the three of us to spend a week together in Florida?
Not just the three of usâ¦
KENNY KONG, FLASH THOMPSON and MARY JANE WATSON stand.
Osborn, dude! You rock!
Seven days in the sun and surf.
All you can eat!
Girls in bikinis!
75. FLASH, KONG (UNISON)
76. MARY JANE
Hi, Sha Shan. Hi, Glory.
Sha Shanâ¦ uhâ¦ Soâ¦ how much of that did you hear?
Look, Glory, you know I meant you, right? I mean who else would I want to see in a bikini. Uh, youâre not gonna break up with me again, are you?
Kong and Flash sit. SALLY AVRIL, RAND ROBERTSON, LIZ ALLAN and JASON IONELLO STAND.
Oh. My. God. Harry, I just found the invitation in my locker. And all I have to say is that you can be my super-dweeb sugar-daddy anytime you want!
You okay with that Rand?
âScool. You can be my super-dweeb sugar-daddy too.
Exactly how many people did you invite to this thing?
A handful. Kenny and Glory. Flash and Sha Shan. Rand and Sally. Hobie and Mindy. M.J. Gwen. Oh, and you and Liz, of course.
Harryâ¦ Liz and Peter broke up.
You did?! Wow. I had no idea. Guess Iâve just been so focused on my own problems. My Dad dying and everything. Thatâs why I need this trip. Gotta clear my head, you know? But maybe you two could reconcileâ¦
I donât think so!
Itâs too late for that Harry. Iâm with Jason now. We totally fell in love doing the play together.
89. SALLY / LIZ (UNISON)
Yes, you did. / Yes, we did.
You donât mind if I bring Jason instead of Petey, do you.
The more the merrier.
Thanks, Harry. Youâre a doll. Kisses!
Liz, Sally, Jason and Rand sit.
Pete, youâre still invited too. Course, itâs more of a coupleâs thing. But M.J.âs guy is in prisonâ¦
94. MARY JANE
Thank you, Harry. Hadnât been reminded of that in the last five minutes.
Sorry, sorry. Itâs just that I canât help remembering the Fall Formal. You two made such a great pair! Donât you think so, Gwen?
Iâ¦ suppose we could goâ¦ as friends. Just as friends.
98. MARY JANE
Weâll talk later, Tiger.
Mary Jane, Peter, Gwen and Harry sit. Kafka and CURT CONNORS STAND.
Late that afternoon in Dr. Kafkaâs officeâ¦
Doctor Connors, itâs good to see you. Iâd heard you moved to Florida.
I did. But I never stopped working on a cure for Max Dillon. I think Iâve made some real progress.
Thatâs wonderful news. Max is downstairsâ¦ doing âwork-therapyâ. Iâll take you to himâ¦
Kafka and Curt sit. Otto, Dominique, Electro, Dracon, John, Eddie and Cletus STAND.
Ms. Destine. I think I found something.
Is it my jewels?
Itâ¦ it appears to be a spearhead. It looks quite old.
Give it to me.
Yes. This is it. I think weâre done, boys.
Indeed. And just as the dig brought us right up against Ravencroftâs outer wall.
You mean this wall?!
Electro blasts a huge hole in the wall. When the smoke clears, the Vulture is waiting. He grabs Octavius.
Youâre coming with me, Otto.
No, no, stop. I donât want this life anymoreâ¦ Iâm trying to get better!! Let me go!!
Shut it, Doc! Itâs for your own good!
Otto, Electro and Vulture sit.
Vulture and Electro leave with Octavius. Dominique watches them go.
Well, that was diverting. And such excellent timing as well: itâs sunset. <transformation scream>
With the setting of the sun, Dominique Destine transforms into a gargoyleâ¦ just as Kafka and Connors enterâ¦
Kafka and Curt STAND.
119. KAFKA / CURT
Oh my godâ¦ / What in the world?!
Demona effortlessly slams them both against a wall and turns to the remaining inmatesâ¦
121. CURT, KAFKA
Listen carefully, humans. For I have listened to you. I can make all your petty little dreams come true. Dominic demands respect.
John craves power.
Eddie needs hate.
And all Cletus desires is a little carnage.
Or a lot. Iâm not picky.
Then stick with me, boys. Respect, power, hatred, carnage. These are things I knowâ¦
DEMONA, Cletus, Eddie, John and Dracon sit. ALAN OâNEIL and GEORGE STACY STAND.
Later, the police arrive to investigateâ¦
And you never met this broad before in your lifeâ¦
She had excellent references, Officer OâNeil. Itâs not like I grant just anyone access to my patientsâ¦
And you wonder why people think they belong at Rykers.
Thereâs nothing else you can tell me, Doctor?
Iâm sorry, Captain Stacy, but no. It was a creature.
Like that Lizard-thing from last fall?
No! No. Nothing like that. More likeâ¦ like those things on the news that blew up the clock tower.
You mean the 23rd Precinct.
Youâre saying a gargoyle kidnapped those men.
Yes. No. I donât know. Can I leave now?
George, OâNeil and Kafka sit. DILBERT TRILBY and NED LEE stand.
Doctor Connors! Dilbert Trilby, Action News. What can you tell our audience about the escape?
Nothing. No comment.
Hey, Doc. Remember me? Ned Lee from The Bugle. Can you just tell me who escaped? Doc Ock? Electro? Colonel Jupiter â" I mean, Colonel Jameson?
Iâm sure the police will issue a statement. Now, I have to go.
Trilby sits. CALYPSO EZILI, KRAVEN THE HUNTER and GULYADKIN STAND.
Connors hurries away down the street, as a limousine with dark-tinted windows pulls up in front of Ravencroft.
We are too late, my love. The Christian Totem is gone.
Gulyadkin and I will track it for you.
<low lion growl>
Iâm afraid that is beyond even your impressive abilities, Sergei, my love. But I have my own ways, as you well knowâ¦
Of course, Calypso.
Who is that? That man trying to hail a cab?
He is a stranger to my eyes. Yet his scent is familiar.
His aura glows with primal energies and may be of use to us.
You need a ride.
What? No. No, thank you. Iâll get a cab.
She wasnât asking.
Kraven drags Connors into the limo, which quickly drives awayâ¦
Curt, Kraven, Calypso and Gulyadkin sit.
Hello, Robbie? Iâve got something.
J. JONAH JAMESON, JOE âROBBIEâ ROBERTSON and FREDERICK FOSWELL STAND.
Is that Lee? Put him on speaker.
Now, Jonah, stay calmâ¦
Donât you tell me to stay calm, Joe Robertson. Itâs not your son at risk. Lee, you there?! Iâll give you exactly three-point-seven seconds to tell me Johnâs all right!
Wish I could, Chief. But he disappeared with the rest. There are six inmaâ" uh, patients missing. Itâs not clear if they busted out or were kidnapped.
Well, of course John was kidnapped. You think my son would--
Ned, give me the whole list.
Who cares about the listâ"
It could provide a lead to John.
Doc Ock. Electro. John. Uhâ¦ letâs see. Edward Brock Jr., Cletus Kasady and Dominic Dracon.
Dominic Dracon? The old mob boss? Thereâs a name I havenât heard in a while.
Foswell, you know that world! Find out where Dracon might have gone!
You got it, J.J.
Lee, you stick to the damn super-villain angle! Ock, Electro. Whatâs their next move?!
Robbie, I want every available man on this. No, damnit, I want every man, woman and child on this, available or not. Call Parker. Put Benny the copyboy on it. But Ms. Brant on it. I want John Jameson safely back in his motherâs arms in six-pointâ¦ six-pointâ¦
Itâs okay, Jonah. Weâre on it.
Good. Good. Iâllâ¦ Iâll hit the streets myself. Iâm still the best damn reporter in New York City! Just have to make a call first. Well, what are you all waiting for, get out! Out!
Robbie, Ned and Foswell sit.
179. JONAH (CONT)
Hello, is this WVRN? Travis Marshall, please. Travis? Itâs Jonah. I got a lead for you on the Ravencroft thing.
Whaddayou care why Iâm helping the competition?! I know I hate television! You donât have to tell me that! Iâm not trying to sandbag you, damnit, Iâ¦ Iâm just trying to find my sonâ¦ any way I can.
Jonah sits. SPIDER-MAN STANDS.
That night finds Spider-Man swinging through the cityâ¦
181. PETER (VO)
If I didnât know better, Iâd think Harry was trying to torture me and Gwen. Then again, M.J. is quite the consolation prize. Ah, man, what am I saying? Iâm in love with Gwen. Gwen. Gwendolyn Stacy. Just have to get through the next few weeks and then Harryâll be in a better place, and she and I--
Peteâs ringtone plays Itsy-Bitsy Spider.
Pete. Joe Robertson. Thereâs been an incident at Ravencroft.
Uh huhâ¦ uh huhâ¦ Wait, whoâs missing? Uh oh. Him too? Oh, crap. Sorry, I mean-- What?! Seriously?! Uh, right. Yeah, Iâll keep my eyes open. Camera lens at the ready. Thanks for the heads up. Bye.
Whoa. At least this day canât get any worse!
SMUGGLER #1 stands.
186. SMUGGLER #1
What the hell are those things?!
When am I gonna learn not to say that out loud?
Spidey swings down to find two men in a van being attacked by two gargoyles, Obsidiana and Zafiroâ¦
ZAFIRO and OBSIDIANA STAND.
Hi there. Hate to interrupt, but this lady-esque-blue-creature-thing matches the description of another lady-esque-blue-creature-thing who just busted some folks out of Ravenâ"
What is he babbling about?
I have no idea. I sense no connection between him and the source of the disturbance. But these twoâ¦
192. SMUGGLER #1
Keep her away from us!!
You see, now Iâm on the horns of a dilemmaâ¦ Uh, no offense. Itâs just an expression; I wasnât referring to your rather strikingâ¦ Never mind. See in this particular Spider-Manâs experience, when genetic misfits attack ordinary human beings, Iâm gonna have to side with the humans.
QuÃ© sorpresa. A human with no knowledge of the situation leaping to defend one of his own.
Zafiro attacks Spidey.
196. ZAFIRO, SPIDER-MAN
<ad lib battle efforts, impacts>
Obsidiana rips open the top of the van.
199. SMUGGLER #1
The two humans open fire on her, forcing her to leap awayâ¦ The van peels out. Obsidiana tries to follow, but Spidey webs her wings together.
Smuggler #1 sits.
Por favor! You donât understand the powers that are gathering!!
And youâre the one doing the Gathering, I take it!
Zafiro slams Spidey into a wall. By the time the web-slinger recovers, the gargoyles are goneâ¦
Zafiro and Obsidiana sit.
<groan> For a guy with no legs, that snake-thing can moveâ¦
Spider-Man sits. George and MARIA CHAVEZ STAND.
Not far awayâ¦
Captain Stacy. What brings you to whatâs left of the 23rd?
Itâs the Ravencroft thing. Iâve got corroborating witnesses telling me a gargoyle was involved.
<sigh> I miss the days when being a cop didnât involve a working knowledge of The Twilight Zone.
Welcome to the Freak Show.
Anyway, as it happens, the Gargoyle Taskforce is meeting right now. First trailer on the right. Ask for Bluestone.
Chavez sits. MATT BLUESTONE, MORGAN MORGAN, MARGOT YALE and Elisa STAND.
And thatâs all I knowâ¦
Well, that is interesting, or, you knowâ¦ really, really scary.
Iâll say, Detective. With or without a gargoyle, Iâve heard Ock and Electro are bad news. And that Cletus Kasady: he killed five people before--
Forget Kasady. Any idiot can bring a serial killer down. Itâs the gargoyle we should be concerned with. Itâs what Iâve been saying all along! Those monsters are dangerous!
I think what A.D.A. Yale is saying, Captain, is that the Taskforce is on it. Weâll let you know if we hear anything. And weâll be checking in with all our sources, wonât we, Detective?
Elisa, Matt, Margot, Morgan and George sit. Smuggler #1 and Demona STAND.
Meanwhile, a van with a torn up roof pulls up to a Gramercy Park Mansionâ¦ The driver speaks into the intercomâ¦
223. SMUGGLER #1
Longinus sent me.
Leave the package. Then take your money and go. While you still can.
225. SMUGGLER #1
Geez, who lives here? Draculaâs daughter?
Smuggler #1 sits. Eddie, John and Cletus STAND.
Demona collects her package.
The old guyâs asleep. Whatâs that?
A simple wooden shaft. The prize of Adolph Hitlerâs personal collection. After hisâ¦ demise, his remaining followers smuggled it to Brazil. I paid handsomely to have it smuggled to me.
Why? I mean sure, itâs the shaft of a spear. Completes the set with that arrowhead you took from Ravencroft. But why do we care?
Demona joins the spear and spearhead together. Instantly, it radiates incredible power.
The Holy Lance. The Spear of Destiny. The weapon that pierced the side of the Christ. Do you still want power, John? This is power.
Give it to me. Give it!
No. This power is mine. But I will use it to give you back your ownâ¦
She points the Spear at John Jameson. The magic surrounds him and transforms him into Colonel Jupiter!
236. COLONEL JUPITER
<transformation scream> Yes! The power is mine! I am Colonel Jupiter!
For what thatâs worthâ¦ Now for Eddie.
Extremely. We are Venom again.
And what about you, Cletus?
(pointing at Venom)
Iâll have what heâs havingâ¦
As you wishâ¦ Carnage.
All right, Demona. Youâre the Mirror Universe Wizard of Oz. But what now?
Mine is the Power. But I still require the Kingdom and the Glory. This is only the first act, humansâ¦ or whatever you are now. The main event is still to comeâ¦
Demona, VENOM, CARNAGE and COLONEL JUPITER sit.
END ACT ONE
TOMORROW: ACT TWO...