A Station Eight Fan Web Site

Gargoyles

The Phoenix Gate

Ask Greg Archives

Ramblings

Archive Index


: « First : « 1000 : « 100 : « 10 : Displaying #1109 - #1118 of 1466 records. : 10 » : 100 » : Last » :


Posts Per Page: 1 : 10 : 25 : 50 : 100 : All :


Bookmark Link

"Hunter's Moon" Memo #4B

And here is the rest of the 4th Hunter's Moon Memo...

Michael, the above represents my ideal Part Two. I think it paces down nicely from Part One, (and you'll note that the changes it requires to Part One are negligible). The Elisa/Jason relationship is allowed to build in a more natural, slower and step-by-step manner. Then it ends as planned, topping anything we've ever done before by blowing up the clocktower. I have two (probably obvious) concerns. One minor, one not so. The minor concern is that the middle is pretty talky for a stand alone episode. Not much we can do about that and still have all three parts play as one piece. So I vote to make each talk-scene as tight as possible, playing up the tension in the middle and otherwise not to sweat this minor concern. The major concern is that it's probably too long for one twenty-two minute episode. If I was being honest, it feels to me like we've got four acts worth of material instead of three. Call me about this either way. If you feel you can fit it in then go for it. If not, here's plan B:

PART ONE CHANGES:
Beat #12 would have to end with the following:
It's only after injuring Angela that the Hunters seem to realize that Angela is not the "demon" they've been hunting. Not that they're remorseful -- just surprised that Demona is NOT the last surviving member of her evil race -- as they had always been taught. Hunter/Robyn says this revelation explains the reports of numerous sightings of gargoyles in the Manhattan area, which is what brought them to town in the first place. Hunter/Jason is furious that the "demons" escaped and determined to hunt them down and exterminate them all. Hunter/Jon questions whether this is the correct course. They know the "demon" is evil. But these other gargoyles might not be. Hunter/Jason quickly and semi-violently reprimands his compatriot. As far as he's concerned the only good gargoyle is a dead gargoyle. And the only consolation from tonight's fiasco is that he's pretty sure he nailed one of them.

And at the beginning of beat13:
The trio and Bronx are already there when Hudson, Goliath and Angela make it back to the clock tower. They are horrified to see Angela's condition.

PART TWO CHANGES:
ACT ONE
Beat 14:
Should end on the Hunter's tirade about wiping every last gargoyle off the face of the earth -- not on Demona gliding away.

Beat 15:
Cut.

Beat 16:
Cut.

Beats 17:
Basically picks up where the revised beat 13 left off, with the trio already there and Angela dying. This beat is combined with beat 18 to form one uninterrupted beat. No act breaks.

Beat 18:
This beat is combined with beat 17 to form one uninterrupted beat. No Act Break. Also, just before the gargoyles turn to stone, Elisa would promise to find out everything she can.

Beat 19:
(Stay with me, 'cause this is complicated.) If there's room for beats 20 and 24 to stay as two separate beats, then beat 19 can stay the same. If not beat 19 can be cut here to show up later at beat 23A.

Beat 20:
If there's room for beats 20 and 24 to stay as two separate beats, then beat 20 can stay the same. If not beat 20 can be cut here and combined with beat 24.

Beat 21:
No change.

Beat 22:
Mostly stays the same, but at the end of the beat, we'd need to show the container of D/I-7 and the Borgia Tablet at Nightstone.

Beat 23:
No change.

Beat 23A:
Only necessary if you are combining beats 20 and 24. This is the former Beat 19. Elisa comes down stairs to find Matt (who would now just be coming on-shift as opposed to off). Matt's talking to reporter Jon. Elisa runs out alone. Jason follows her.

Beat 24:
No change, unless you need to combine it with beat 20 to save more space. If so, it combines as follows....
Outside by Elisa's car, Jason catches up to her. He can tell she's upset: "You didn't rush us out of there just so you wouldn't have to answer questions about gargoyles." Of course not, she replies. Gargoyles? Are you kidding? How silly. She's about to get in her car, but he puts a hand on her arm and stops her gently, but firmly: "Then what is it?" She hesitates, then tells him that a dear friend was violently attacked recently. She came very close to dying. He asks if they know who did it? No, not yet, and she feels so... so... He knows what she means before she can say it: "You feels frustrated. Helpless. You wants to nail the guy who hurt your friend." That's it, she says. That's it exactly. How did he know? Because he's been there. He's still there. She looks at him. He asks how her friend is doing now. Elisa says something like no news is good news, I'm sure she's all right. Jason: "And what about you? Are you all right?" She says sure, don't worry about me. I'm a rock. Feeling awkward, he turns to go. She hesitates, then surprises herself by asking if he's free for dinner. He considers it. Actually, there was something he was supposed to do, but...sure. He'd love to.

Beat 25:
After Goliath witnesses the kiss, we fade to black and end the act.

ACT TWO
Beat 25A:
Picks up where we left off and finishes out the former Beat 25.

Beat 26:
Instead of the blimp, Goliath finds and heads for the Hunter's High-Tech airship.

Beat 27:
Goliath, Lex and Brooklyn breaks into the airship. No immediate sign of a trap, but they soon runs into Demona inside the airship on a similar errand to erradicate the Hunters. This beat is combined with beat 28 to form one uninterrupted beat. No Act Break.

Beat 28:
This beat is combined with beat 27 to form one uninterrupted beat. No Act Break in between them. Demona is surprised to see Goliath, who physically attacks her demanding to know her connection to the Hunters. She tries to explain that she is their prey. But he doesn't listen. At least he doesn't listen until all four gargoyles are captured by Hunter/Jon and Hunter/Robyn. Act Break.

ACT THREE
Beat 28A:
The Hunters are waiting for their leader to show up. They imprison the gargoyles, (and Hunter/Robyn has the opportunity to plant a homing device on Goliath, though we don't know that she's done this yet). They leave them alone in their cells, giving Demona a chance to explain that the Hunters are gargoyle-haters who first appeared in the 11th century. They destroyed the last clan of gargoyles in Scotland. Only Demona escaped, and the Hunters have been hounding her ever since. Goliath tells Demona that the Hunters nearly killed their daughter Angela. Demona burns with cold fury. As much as she hates Goliath, Demona refuses to let the Hunters slay even one more gargoyle. She offers to help them escape. Goliath doesn't want escape, he wants vengeance. Finally, Goliath is sounding like a true gargoyle to Demona. Unfortunately, he's also sounding like an idiot. Vengeance will come, she promises that. But now they've lost the element of surprise on the Hunter's home turf. They must escape. And somehow, by working together, they do, seemingly taking out Hunter/Robyn and Hunter/Jon in the process.

Beat 28B:
Safely outside the airship, Demona is pleased. Perhaps she and Goliath are not so far apart. Perhaps not, Goliath agrees grimly. Demona veers away. Brooklyn cannot believe that Goliath is just letting her go. But Goliath: "She was not our enemy tonight." Oh, yeah?! What about the D/I-7? We'll worry about that later. Let's go home. They veer off for home. Time cut.

Beat 29:
Time has passed. Hunter/Jason has arrived on the airship and has clearly just been filled in on the night's events: "You LET them escape?!!" (We are beginning to see distinctions between the Hunters' personalities. Hunter/Jason is the fiery, passionate leader. Hunter/Robyn is coldly efficient. Hunter/Jon has some major doubts and is definitely not into this as much as the other two.) Hunter/Jason is furious that H/Jon and H/Robyn let the gargoyles escape -- particularly the "demon". That was the best chance yet to destroy them. Hunter/Jon still isn't sure that they're doing the right thing. They heard the gargoyle's in-cell discussion. The only reason they're attacking us is because we hurt the big one's daughter last night. H/Jon even suspects that the "demon" and the other gargoyles were at odds until our opposition united them. If we hadn't attacked them, they might have even been our allies against the "demon". Hunter/Jason can't believe his ears. He turns to Hunter/Robyn. He knew their brother had some weird ideas, but what's the story with her. She calmly points to images of Brooklyn and Lex on a monitor screen. These are new gargoyles. Different from the ones they faced last night. There's no telling how many more there might be. They had to allow these gargoyles to escape so that they could follow them back to their lair, otherwise we could waste our whole lives tracking them down. Hunter/Jason: So what? It was good enough for our father. H/Jason doesn't care how long it takes to exterminate this evil race of monsters. Hunter/Robyn comments wryly that she'd rather get it over with tonight, if H/Jason doesn't mind. H/Jason calms down a bit. So what's the plan?

Beat 30:
This changes completely. Goliath, Lex and Brooklyn arrive at the clock tower. Everyone else is already there. Goliath tells the others that the Hunters have been dealt a major blow. Brooklyn and Lex exchange concerned glances.

Beat 31:
Inside the airship, the trio of Hunters have locked onto Goliath's homing signal. Hunter/Jason is a bit concerned that they didn't plant a homing device on Demona. But Hunter/Robyn believes that the demon would never have let her touch her without noticing the plant. Besides Hunter/Robyn is confident she knows where to find the "demon". They track Goliath's signal to the clock tower. They know it's above the precinct house and may even be impressed that the gargoyles were clever enough to hide in such plain sight. H/Jason prepares to go in. H/Robyn stops him and begins to activate weapon systems instead. There could be a clan of thirty or forty gargoyles in there. H/Jon doubts if there's more than six. He can't believe what she's preparing to do. There's a building full of people in there. She's confident she can target the tower with some precision. A squeamish H/Jon fumfers, but suggests they wait a couple hours until sunrise. The gargoyles will be stone and can easily be destroy then . But H/Robyn shakes her head. We cannot count on that. She puts a picture of Demona on a monitor screen, side-by-side with a picture of Dominique. She then uses a sophisticated computer program to demonstrate that Demona/Dominique are one and the same person. Dominique has never been seen after dark, and since no one's ever spotted a gargoyle in broad daylight, H/Robyn correctly surmises that the "demon" transforms into Dominique every morning at sunrise. H/Jason wants to know how this is possible? H/Robyn shrugs. How is it possible that the demon has lived as long as she has? The obvious answer is sorcery, and if Demona/Dominique has shared this sorcery with the other gargoyles, then they could easily sneak out of the precinct house in the morning disguised as humans, and we'd never find them. H/Jon is still against the still unstated plan. Both turn to H/Jason for his final decision. Do it, he says. But let's make sure that none of them escape. It ends tonight.

Beat 32:
No change.

Beat 33:
No change.

Beat 34:
Lex notices the homing device stuck to Goliath's skin. Quick cut.

Beat 35:
No change.

Beat 36:
No change.


Bookmark Link

Hunter's Moon Memo #4A

In anticipation of my ramble on "Hunter's Moon, Part Two", here is the first half of Memo #4 from back in the day...

"But wait!" you're asking, "What happened to Memo #3?!" Well, I have it -- on paper. But not on my computer for some reason, and I don't have either a scanner or the time to type it up afresh. So you'll have to settle for jumping ahead to Memo #4. This is my beat sheet breakdown on the first two parts of Hunter's Moon.

The whole memo was too long for one post, it seems, so I'll be posting the second half shortly.

WEISMAN 7-16-95

Notes on "Hunter's Moon" Outline...
Please note that any changes to the Beat Sheet for Part One will be in bold type.

BEAT SHEET
PART ONE
ACT ONE
1. PROLOGUE - SCOTLAND, 994 -- HUNTER'S MOON
We open with YOUNG GILLECOMGAIN confronting DEMONA (in either new footage or re-use from "City of Stone, Part One"). Very mysterioso at first. Then we realize that Demona is simply scavenging for food in Gille's barn. He surprises her and winds up scarred for life. She leaves.
Continue the scene. Hearing Gille's screams, GILLECOMGAIN'S FATHER comes rushing into the barn after Demona has left. He is largely unsympathetic, even a bit of a jerk toward his son. He sees the scratch marks and tells his son to suck it up, basically. It sounds to him like his son was attacked by a gargoyle looking for food. But Gille insists it was a "demon". And swears that she will pay along with her entire evil race.

MANHATTAN, 1996. - NIGHT ONE
2. A blonde woman (SALLI ROBERTSON actually ELISA MAZA in disguise) is alone on a subway platform. A real seedy place. Very scary. Suddenly a THUG appears out of the shadows. Invades her personal space. She tries to move cautiously away, but a SECOND THUG cuts her off. And then a THIRD, a FOURTH, a FIFTH. They don't attack her, but they do seem to be taking some real sadistic pleasure in intimidating the hell out of her. All are wearing long trenchcoats, which might or might not conceal weapons.
The subway finally comes. She gets onto a car which is sparsely populated by an OLD LADY, BRENDAN & MARGOT, a burly WORKER, etc. And we think she's safe, but at the last second the thugs also enter the car. The subway exits the station.
As the train races through dark tunnels, the thugs pull out Xanatos/Dracon particle beam weapons and demand all valuables. (Major overkill on the part of the thugs.) Maybe the burly worker gets brave, and although Salli tries to stop him, he gets hurt (but not shot) for his pains.
The train exits the tunnel onto elevated tracks. And to make a long explanation short, this is where the gargoyles (GOLIATH, BROOKLYN, LEXINGTON, BROADWAY and ANGELA) get involved. The fast-moving el-train should add to the challenge of stopping five heavily-armed thugs. At a crucial moment, Salli/Elisa should slam Thug #1, who had a bead on Goliath. She pulls off the blonde wig, revealing herself, saying that she doesn't like anyone messing with her best friend in the world. Everyone is saved. Though as usual, the passengers are more afraid of the gargoyles than the thugs. The gargoyles leave the moving train just before the next stop, promising to touch base with Elisa later. The train pulls in. MATT BLUESTONE, MORGAN and other COPS are waiting, (they've been trying to catch this gang of thugs for weeks). Matt (who knows about the gargoyles) sees the unconcious thugs, and says something like, "Had a little help, did we?" "No more than usual," she replies with a smile. Or something like that.

3. We catch up with the gargoyles in flight, who are pretty proud of themselves. Even Goliath. They've gotten this protection thing down. Stopping evil stone cold, etc. They glide in for a landing at the clock tower. HUDSON and BRONX welcome them back. Hudson fusses a bit as Brooklyn has a very minor injury from the subway encounter. But Brooklyn considers it a badge of honor, and besides the stone hibernation will heal him. Life is sweet. The sun rises and they all turn to stone. (Play this up for the video audience -- it's still one of our coolest trademarks.)

4. Downstairs in the precinct house a bit later, CAPTAIN CHAVEZ informs Elisa that she's being reassigned to the dayshift to show a new detective the ropes. Both Elisa and Matt protest. Why break up a good team? (Elisa's simultaneously thinking of Matt and her nighttime-only forays with Goliath and the gargoyles.) Chavez tells her it's temporary and in any case it wasn't a request. The new detective enters. It's JASON CONOVER. He's a big, rugged guy. Sort of a human Goliath. Elisa and Jason size each other up. And though neither would say it yet, they like what they see. At any rate, Matt notices that Elisa has suddenly stopped protesting the reassignment.

5. Dayshift with Elisa and Jason. She's showing him the city in her Fairlane. She asks him about himself. But he's subtly evasive and keeps turning the conversation back toward her. In particular asking what it's like to be a cop in the Big Apple. He's heard some weird stuff about alligators in the sewers and other urban myths. She smiles. She could tell him stories.

Suddenly, there's an explosion at a nearby XANATOS ENTERPRISES chemical storage warehouse on the East River. They call it in, head over, and it looks like they've caught two MASKED THIEVES who each have their hands full carrying containers of stolen chemicals marked D/I-7. They order the thieves to put down the containers, which they do. But the thieves had BACK-UP, and now it's Jason and Elisa who appear to be surrounded and in big trouble. It looks bad, and there ain't gonna be any gargoyle rescue at high noon.

ACT TWO
6. Jason doesn't hesitate. He shoots one of the chemical containers. It blows up and in the resulting chaos, the thieves grab the remaining container and take off in an unmarked panel truck. Elisa and Jason pursue in her car. Cool car chase. He's as impressed with her driving as she is with his shooting. All done fearlessly while under fire from the bad guys. Point is, they make a good team. Anyway, the good guys eventually capture all the bad guys (except THIEF #1, who escapes) and confiscate the D/I-7 without knowing what the theft was all about.

7. NIGHTSTONE UNLIMITED. It's twilight. Company president DOMINIQUE DESTINE is interviewing for a new personal assistant. The candidate is one ROBYN CORREY, who immediately impresses Dominique with her Owen-like efficiency and smarts. A man enters who we may or may not recognize as Thief #1. He's about to start blabbing in front of Robyn, but Dominique tells him to shut up and wait. Dominique turns to Correy and tells her she has the job. Correy is prepared to start right this minute if necessary. She's not afraid of long hours and happy to work nights with the boss if that's required. Dominique smiles. Correy may indeed work nights, but Dominique never does. She needs her beauty sleep. Robyn can start first thing in the morning. Correy exits and Dominique and the thief open a secret panel into a high-tech command center. The thief lets Dominique know that they didn't get the D/I-7. She's furious and comes close to doing something really nasty to him. But through a large (one-way) bay window she sees that the sun is about to set. She tells him he's lucky to work for such a kind employer and kicks him out. Well, if you want something done right you have to do it yourself. The sun sets and Dominique transforms into DEMONA.

ACT THREE
8. At the clock tower, Elisa arrives just as the sun sets on our gargoyles. They EXPLODE out of their stone shell. A sight that still impresses her no matter how many times she sees it. (Again, play up this series trademark for the video audience. Also make a point of showing that Brooklyn's minor injury is healed.) Elisa fills the gargoyles in on the attempted chemical theft. She speaks highly of Jason, and when Goliath notes that she seems highly impressed with her new partner, she stumbles all over herself to say that he's just o.k. Even she doesn't yet know why she got so flustered. But it doesn't escape Goliath's notice or Hudson's or Angela's. Elisa's just finished working a double shift and has to head home for some sleep, but she's afraid that whoever was behind the theft might try again tonight. Either at the same East River warehouse or at another one on the upper westside where computer records show Xanatos also keeps D/I-7. The gargoyles agree to split up and stake out both locations. But Goliath is suspicious. If Xanatos is involved.... Elisa knows exactly what he means. She wanted to question Xanatos herself, but (because Elisa is admittedly irrational in her hatred of Xanatos) Chavez said no and sent Matt instead.

NIGHT TWO
9. At the Eyrie Building, Matt is almost done questioning XANATOS about the theft. Xanatos is clearly more interested in playing with his baby son ALEXANDER, than in answering Matt's questions. He has no idea why anyone would want to steal this particular chemical. D/I-7 is a potent concentrated disinfectant, newly invented by Xanatos Enterprises, but hardly worth stealing unless you have a very big and very dirty house that needs cleaning. Matt's sure Xanatos is hiding something, but leaves when OWEN enters with Xanatos' next appointment: newspaper reporter JON CARTER. Xanatos hands Alexander over to Owen and tours his castle with Carter. (Note: Owen still has a stone fist. He can either keep it in his pocket or not. I don't care, but don't forget about it.) Carter asks Xanatos about the castle and the gargoyles that were part of the itemized price. Xanatos says something about them not suiting his aesthetic tastes and having them destroyed. Carter questions whether Xanatos would really destroy such ancient works of art. Xanatos: "If you brought them in front of me now, I'd pulverize them to dust right here." Carter asks about the gargoyle urban myths that have everyone in New York claiming that their best friend's uncle's dentist has seen real live gargoyles. Xanatos comments that he thought the only paper interested in that kind of "scoop" was The Daily Tattler. Somewhere in here, before he leaves, Jon drops his pencil and picks it up.
After the reporter's exit, Xanatos and Owen watch a replay of Jon Carter's little pencil drop which was picked up by hidden camera. They see that he picked up a sliver of stone -- most probably a left-over piece of exfoliated gargoyle stone. Xanatos takes his baby from Owen and says something like: "This Mr. Carter could cause a bit of trouble for our old friend Goliath." At this point it's ambiguous whether Xanatos is pleased about this or not.

10. Goliath, Hudson and Angela are staked out across from the East River Xanatos warehouse that the thieves hit earlier that day. A high-tech flying vehicle arrives on the scene and three figures leap out of it (two male and one female). Each wears a black mask with three stylized red slash marks painted diagonally across it. The masks completely obscures their faces, but we'll soon learn that these are the three HUNTERS (HUNTER/JASON, HUNTER/ROBYN and HUNTER/JON). The gargoyles assume that these are the thieves and attack, Angela impetuously taking the lead. The Hunters (whose voices are electronically filtered by their masks so that we don't immediately recognize them) are strangely not surprised to see the female gargoyle Angela (who they at first mistake for Demona) but are very surprised to see Goliath and Hudson. They thought there was only one "demon" left alive. No matter. They'll destroy them all. The battle is joined.

11. Cut to the second warehouse on the westside, where Brooklyn leads Broadway, Lex and Bronx on a second stakeout. Demona breaks in to steal the D/I-7, leaving tell-tale claw marks at the break in point. She wasn't expecting to see the gargoyles, but she's not unprepared for a fight. It's quite a battle, but Demona manages to get away with one container of D/I-7. (I'll leave the details to you, Michael.)

12. Back to first East River warehouse. A furious battle between Hunters and "prey". Hunters seem completely prepared to fight gargoyles specifically. Angela is very badly injured, and Goliath and Hudson are barely able to escape with her. It's only after injuring Angela that the Hunters seem to realize that Angela is not the "demon" they've been hunting. Not that they're remorseful -- just surprised that Demona is NOT the last surviving member of her evil race -- as they had always been taught. Hunter/Jason is furious that the "demons" escaped and determined to hunt them down and exterminate them all.

13. Hudson, Goliath and Angela make it back to the clock tower. Angela's in a bad way. If she can make it to dawn, she'll be healed by the transformation to stone. But dawn is hours away. It doesn't look good. We've NEVER seen Goliath so angry. (Which doesn't mean he's over the top. It can be internalized to the point of near-combustibility, but we need to know how deep the fury goes.) Hudson tries to calm him down. But Goliath swears that he will hunt down these Hunters. And he will KILL them.
END PART ONE

PART TWO
ACT ONE
14. PROLOGUE - FLORENCE, 1496 A.D. - HUNTER'S MOON
Demona steals an already ancient MYSTIC TABLET from the home of the BORGIAS, only to be pursued by a RENAISSANCE-ERA HUNTER, hunting the last of the "demons". He wears a version of the stylized Hunter's mask, wields an impressive cross-bow and other weapons and chases after Demona in a flying machine designed by LEONARDO DA VINCI. We have a cool action sequence, but Demona ultimately cripples the Hunter's "vehicle" and escapes with the Borgia tablet. The Hunter shouts after her that the battle isn't over. His family has hunted her across generations for 500 years. If he fails, then his son will take up the hunt. And his son's son. It may take another five hundred years, but the Hunt won't end until the last of the gargoyles is wiped off the face of the earth. We watch as Demona glides off in the distance and RIPPLE DISSOLVE TO:

MANHATTAN, 1996. - NIGHT TWO (CONTINUED)
15. Demona carrying the container of D/I-7 glides in for a landing at her Gramercy Park Mansion. She enters her study and places the chemical container next to the Borgia tablet. It's taken her 500 years but her plan to destroy the hated humans is finally coming to fruition. Now she must prepare for the coming day. "Dominique" has much to do before the Hunter's Moon.

16. We're at what appears to be the gutted shell of a condemned tenement building in the South Bronx. The Hunters' high-tech vehicle flies in and we realize that what appeared to be urban decay on the outside is actually an elaborate camouflage for the high-tech Hunter's Lair. The Hunters disembark (but do not remove their masks). We begin to see distinctions in their personalities. Hunter/Jason is the fiery, passionate leader. Hunter/Robyn is coldly efficient. Hunter/Jon is definitely not into this as much as the other two. Hunter/Robyn immediately checks their computers. Police radio calls indicate that while they were at Xanatos' East River warehouse, D/I-7 was stolen from Xanatos' upper westside warehouse. Probably by the "demon" herself. Hunter/Jason is frustrated that they missed a perfect chance to destroy the "demon". But all of them are still stunned at tonight's discovery that Demona is NOT the last surviving member of her evil race -- as they had always been taught. Hunter/Robyn says this revelation explains the reports of numerous sightings of gargoyles in the Manhattan area, which is what brought them to town in the first place. Hunter/Jason is determined to hunt down every last one, but Hunter/Jon questions whether this is the correct course. They know the "demon" is evil. But these other gargoyles might not be. Hunter/Jason quickly and semi-violently reprimands his compatriot. As far as he's concerned the only good gargoyle is a dead gargoyle. And the only consolation from tonight's fiasco is that he's pretty sure he nailed one of them.

17. At the clock tower, the trio come in for a landing with Bronx. Before they're through the clockface door they're already calling inside about how Demona got away with the D/I-7. But they shut up fast when they see the grim situation inside. Angela's bandaged up, but she's having trouble breathing, and it's very touch and go. Goliath tells her to hold on. Sunrise will come soon and heal her. But Angela's not going to make it until then. She suddenly goes into cardiac arrest. She has stopped breathing, and her heart has stopped beating.

ACT TWO
18. Suddenly Elisa is there, pushing past the other gargoyles to perform CPR on Angela, saving her life. It's pre-dawn now, just enough time to fill Elisa in on the Hunters and Demona. Just enough time for Goliath to reiterate his vow of vengeance against the Hunters. And then everyone turns to stone in a tableau around Angela. A disturbed Elisa is left alone to head downstairs.

19. Down in the precinct house, reporter Jon Carter is questioning Matt Bluestone (who's just coming off shift) about gargoyle sightings. (Including maybe witness reports of gargoyles helping to bust up the subway bandits the night before and/or breaking into a Xanatos warehouse last night.) Matt tells the reporter he doesn't believe in gargoyles -- but U.F.O.'s on the other hand, now Matt has plenty of theories about them. (Did you know the statues on Easter Island were modeled after space aliens?) Elisa sees her new partner Detective Jason Conover watching with some amusement as Matt makes a fool of the reporter. She grabs Jason and marches him out the door. She's in no mood to sit for an interview right now, and besides, they have a crime scene to investigate.

20. As Elisa drives across town in her Fairlane, Jason can tell she's upset: "You didn't rush us out of there just so you wouldn't have to answer questions about gargoyles." Of course not, she replies. Gargoyles? Are you kidding? How silly. They pull over in front of Xanatos' westside warehouse. She's about to get out of the car, but he puts a hand on her arm and stops her gently, but firmly: "Then what is it?" She hesitates, then tells him that a dear friend was violently attacked recently. She came very close to dying. He asks if they know who did it? No, not yet, and she feels so... so... He knows what she means before she can say it: "You feels frustrated. Helpless. You wants to nail the guy who hurt your friend." That's it, she says. That's it exactly. How did he know? Because he's been there. He's still there. She looks at him. Then they get out of the car and go inside.

21. Inside the westside warehouse crime scene, Owen is taking inventory of what was stolen. Elisa sends Jason to check the point of entry, so that she can speak to Owen alone. She's hostile. She suspects Xanatos of being in cahoots with Demona. Owen attempts to assure her that Xanatos has had no contact with Demona, and that in fact Xanatos still feels he owes Goliath a debt of gratitude for helping save his son Alexander. If there's any way that either Owen or Mr. Xanatos could be of assistance... No, thanks. She's had enough of Xanatos' help to last a lifetime. (Now, ironically, Owen is telling the truth. But he should relate it all in such a superior Owenesque manner, and Elisa should respond to it with such incredible suspicion and contempt that Elisa and our audience will be quite convinced that Xanatos is -- as usual -- up to no good. And for his part, Owen doesn't care if Elisa feels that way.)

Jason calls Elisa over. He's found a set of Demona's clawmarks at the point of illegal entry and asks Elisa what she makes of them. Elisa plays dumb. Jason comments that they look like claw marks. But what could be strong enough to leave clawmarks in solid stone?

22. Nightstone Unlimited, bio-labs. Dominique introduces her assistant Robyn Correy to Nightstone chief scientist DOCTOR ANTON SEVARIUS. He's demonstrating a new CARRIER VIRUS. Extremely contagious, very-fast acting, but harmless. (It'd be great if we could demonstrate this in some visual way that doesn't totally tip our hand.) Dominique tells her assistant that the virus can be molecularly bonded with curative medicines and thus be used to counteract epidemics. Robyn points out that it could just as easily be bonded with a disease and cause the epidemic in the first place. There's an uncomfortable moment of silence, but Robyn does not seem upset by the prospect she's outlined. "Either way," she continues, "A most profitable endeavor." Sevarius and Dominique exchange a glance, and Dominique smiles at her new assistant: "I think you're going to fit in just fine."

23. Sunset at the clocktower and the gargoyles EXPLODE from stone. Everyone's first concern is for Angela. She's all healed. Maybe just a bit tired still. Goliath is still determined to get vengeance on the Hunters. The other gargoyles agree, including Angela. Goliath is concerned for her, but she doesn't want any kid glove treatment. She's the one that they hurt. She wants her chance for revenge too. At the moment, this is logic that makes sense to Goliath. They split up in groups of two (Broadway & Angela, Lex & Brooklyn, Hudson & Bronx) to search for the Hunters. (And yes, Goliath is conspicuously without a partner.) Goliath gives strict orders not to engage them in battle. Find them and come back to report. All the gargoyles leave. And a few seconds later, Elisa comes up the stairs to find the tower empty.

NIGHT THREE
24. Outside by Elisa's car, Jason catches up to her. He asks if there's any word on her friend. Elisa says something like no news is good news, I'm sure she's all right. Jason: "And what about you? Are you all right?" She says sure, don't worry about me. I'm a rock. Feeling awkward, he turns to go. She hesitates, then surprises herself by asking if he's free for dinner. He considers it. Actually, there was something he was supposed to do, but...sure. He'd love to.

25. Elisa and Jason arrive at her apartment. Elisa didn't feel up to facing a crowded restaurant. Besides, she has one of the best stocked refrigerators in the county. (With a friend like Broadway, it's safer.) She brings him a soda in the living room, spills it, etc. They kiss. A soul kiss, as Joe Jackson would say. (And that's when we see Goliath, watching the whole thing from Elisa's rooftop terrace window. He's just standing there like he's been hit in the head by a brick and expects another brick to come along any time now.) Elisa pulls away from Jason. What's wrong, he wants to know? Well, we're partners for one thing. He doesn't buy that excuse. That's a temporary assignment. In a week, she'll be back on the night shift with Bluestone. She doesn't respond. Jason asks if there is someone else? She says yes, but then after a long, long pause, she changes her answer to no. (And for Goliath, that would be brick #2. He glides away.) Jason is really sympathetic. He realizes he's been rushing things. He also realizes that he hadn't known how lonely he had been until he met Elisa. But he knows she's vulnerable now because of her "injured friend". He doesn't want to take advantage. He leaves Elisa alone -- and more confused than ever.

26. Goliath is gliding through the sky, and as he comes around a building, he can't help but spot a big black blimp with three huge red claw marks painted across it. (Note: this is not the Hunters' Hi-tech airship. This is a blimp, Gothic in design, but slow-moving and relatively low-tech.) Goliath's not the only one to spot it. Lex and Brooklyn glide up along side him. Brooklyn assumes that Goliath is going to want to go back to the clocktower for the others, as planned. But Goliath's in no mood to be patient. He glides toward the large undercarriage cabin; Brook and Lex follow.

27. Goliath glides alongside an outer cabin door, digs his talons into it and rips it off. (It plummets down and lands on VINNIE, the guy who once hit Goliath with a banana cream pie. Vinnie gets a concussion. Spends a few years in physical therapy and then begins to hunt Goliath with a hot fudge sundae. No, just kidding.) The three gargoyles enter the cabin. As soon as they do, a laser grid activates, covering the doorless entrance with pinpoint beams. No one's in the cabin, and all three realize it's some kind of a trap. An explosive one, as Lex points out. The laser grid is hooked up to a whole lot of plastique. If the light from any of the laser beams on the grid is interrupted, the blimp blows to kingdom come. They cannot exit. (Make it clear that the rest of the hull and even "windshield" is beyond their ability to pierce.) Brooklyn: It's a flying roach motel, and we're the roaches. "Very astute," says Demona, who glides up alongside the open door.

ACT THREE
28. Goliath demands to know Demona's connection to the Hunters. "I'm their prey," she says. We all are. She explains that the Hunters are gargoyle-haters who first appeared in the 11th century. They destroyed the last clan of gargoyles in Scotland. Only Demona escaped, and the Hunters have been hounding her ever since. Goliath tells Demona that the Hunters nearly killed their daughter Angela. Demona burns with cold fury. As much as she hates Goliath, Demona refuses to let the Hunters slay even one more gargoyle. She offers to help. Lex is tearing down control panels. The blimp's clearly being operated by remote control. He can't figure out why the Hunters haven't blown them up already. Brooklyn suggests that maybe they don't want to blow the blimp up while it's still flying over a city full of people, which may also explain why the blimp is already heading slow but steady toward the river. Lex needs more time. Demona buys it for him. She glides up to the blimp's rudder and physically forces it to turn back toward the city. Inside, Lex is recrossing wires, etc. Very tense. One wrong choice and that's all she wrote. Finally, he's got it licked. Now he controls the explosives and the blimp. Goliath wants to know if he can figure out where the remote signal was coming from. Lex can't name the location, but he can send the blimp there. Make it so, says Goliath.

29. In their faux-tenement H.Q., Hunter/Jason enters the control room, apologizing for being late. Hunter/Jon and Hunter/Robyn are already there, studying monitor screens that show various angles on the blimp and the gargoyles. Hunter/Jason sees Demona on a monitor. It's the "demon". Blow the blimp up now; Demona's gliding too close to escape the explosion. Hunter/Jon says it's too late. They've lost control of the blimp. Then why did you wait? Because the blimp was still over the city! So what?! Hunter/Jason is furious that Hunter/Jon missed their best chance yet. He turns to Hunter/Robyn. He knew their brother was a softie, but what's the story with her. She calmly points to Brooklyn and Lex on another monitor screen. These are new gargoyles. Different from the ones they faced last night. There's no telling how many more there might be. They have to allow these gargoyles to escape so that they can follow them back to their lair, otherwise we could waste our whole lives tracking them down. Hunter/Jason: So what? It was good enough for our father. He doesn't care how long it takes to exterminate them. Hunter/Robyn comments wryly that she'd rather get it over with tonight, if H/Jason doesn't mind. H/Jason calms down a bit. What's the plan? First, she says calmly, we let them blow us to smithereens.

30. The blimp is closing in on the Hunter's Lair. On Goliath's orders, but with some reluctance and uncertainty, Lex has everything ready. All four gargoyles flee and watch from a nearby rooftop as the blimp smashes into the Bronx tenement H.Q. and BLOWS UP REAL GOOD. It's Hindenburg time. Nothing could survive that inferno. Demona is pleased. For once, Goliath is acting like a true gargoyle. Perhaps she and Goliath are not so far apart. Perhaps not, Goliath agrees grimly. She departs. Brooklyn cannot believe that Goliath is just letting her go. But Goliath: "She was not our enemy tonight." Oh, yeah?! What about the D/I-7? We'll worry about that later. Let's go home. They depart. And after they're gone, the Hunters' Airship, rises out of the flaming wreckage like a dark phoenix.

31. Inside the airship, the trio of Hunters have locked onto the three gargoyles. Hunter/Jason is a bit concerned about letting Demona get away, but Hunter/Robyn assures him that she knows where to find the "demon". None of them much care that the H.Q. was sacrificed. It'll be worth it, if they can destroy the gargoyles. From a distance, they track Goliath, Lex and Brooklyn to the clock tower. They know it's above the precinct house and may even be impressed that the gargoyles were clever enough to hide in such plain sight. H/Jason prepares to go in. H/Robyn stops him and begins to activate weapon systems instead. There could be a clan of thirty or forty gargoyles in there. H/Jon doubts if there's more than six. He can't believe what she's preparing to do. There's a building full of people in there. She's confident she can target the tower with some precision. A squeamish H/Jon fumfers, but suggests they wait a couple hours until sunrise. The gargoyles will be stone and can easily be destroy then . But H/Robyn shakes her head. We cannot count on that. She puts a picture of Demona on a monitor screen, side-by-side with a picture of Dominique. She then uses a sophisticated computer program to demonstrate that Demona/Dominique are one and the same person. Dominique has never been seen after dark, and since no one's ever spotted a gargoyle in broad daylight, H/Robyn correctly surmises that the "demon" transforms into Dominique every morning at sunrise. H/Jason wants to know how this is possible? H/Robyn shrugs. How is it possible that the demon has lived as long as she has? The obvious answer is sorcery, and if Demona/Dominique has shared this sorcery with the other gargoyles, then they could easily sneak out of the precinct house in the morning disguised as humans, and we'd never find them. H/Jon is still against the still unstated plan. Both turn to H/Jason for his final decision. Well, he says, they blew up our home. The least we can do is blow up theirs. But let's make sure that none of the gargoyles escape. It ends tonight.

32. Hunter/Jon and Hunter/Jason exit the ship on sky-sleds, and swing around to guard the clock tower from the air in order to make sure no gargoyles escape what's coming. Below him, Elisa's Fairlane pulls up in front and Elisa goes inside. Hunter/Jason spots her, whispers "no, not now" and after some hesitation, takes his sled down and right toward the front door of the precinct. Hunter/Jon spots him going down and calls out, "You fool, what are you doing?!!"

33. Hunter/Jason smashes through the precinct's front door on his airsled. As cops and perps dodge out of the way, he makes a bee-line for a stunned and surprised Elisa.

34. Up in the tower, Goliath has just finished describing tonight's events to the rest of the gargoyles. They have nothing more to fear from the Hunters.

35. And onboard the airship, Hunter/Robyn presses a button.

36. A missile is launched from the airship, it targets the clocktower, blowing it to hell and gone.
END PART TWO


Bookmark Link

San Diego ComicCon 2006

Hey gang,

I'll be heading down to San Diego tomorrow for ComicCon. I have a panel in Room 9 on Thursday, July 20th at 2:15pm. And I'll be signing Gargoyles comic books (or whatever else people dump in front of me) at least twice a day with David Hedgecock at the SLG Booth. Please stop by and say hello!

And whether or not you personally are going to ComicCon, please help SPREAD THE WORD! There's a lot going on down there, and I don't want to be at that panel all by my lonesome. Help us let the people attending know about the panel, the Gargoyles Comic Book and SLG. (I'll also have fliers and reg forms for G2007.)

Thanks!


Bookmark Link

Chapter  LXIII : "Hunter's Moon, Part One"

Time to ramble...

Chapter  LXIII : "Hunter's Moon, Part One"
Story Editor: Michael Reaves
Writer: Michael Reaves
Director: Dennis Woodyard

The title, I believe, was Michael's.

PREVIOUSLY
It's always a bit of a question what to include on the first "Previously" of a multi-parter. Here -- knowing that we'd be opening the movie with a Gillecomgain flashback -- we chose to establish the idea of the never-ending Hunter by using Duncan & Canmore. We followed that with the bit about Xanatos' debt to Goliath, which I think was me playing fair with the audience for Part Three. Because I spend the rest of David's brief appearances in Hunter's Moon trying desperately to make him seem like a threat -- or at least like someone unsympathetic. Finally, we have Demona's "death" from the Reckoning.

GILLECOMGAIN
We decided -- particularly when Hunter's Moon became a three-parter instead of a Direct-to-Video -- to open every episode with a flashback, starting with the oldest of flashbacks and working our way forward.

We begin by reprising Gillecomgain's scarring at Demona's talons, but I didn't simply want it to play like an elongated "Previously..." so we added new material. We meet Gill's dad, a real prize... that just might help explain why Gill grew up to be such a jerk. But we see that not everyone in medieval society thought of gargoyles as mystic creatures. Dad sees Demona (without actually having seen her) as just one of the risks of doing business.

SUBWAY
Okay, try to remember. When you FIRST saw this episode, did you know that the blonde was Elisa? This is a trick we did before on "Turf"? The idea being that characters in animation generally look enough alike that a clothing and hair color change is usually enough to indicate that similar modeled characters are two different persons. (Look at Krusty and Homer.) Even with the same voice, we often had our regulars play bits. (Of course with our show, sometimes those bits became regulars too.)

Then we have a rogue's gallery of Manhattan regulars aboard that subway. I spot Brendan & Margot, of course. But also Sarah (Billy & Susan's mom), the construction worker and Art & Lois. And of course our trio of gang-bangers. Later, we have Morgan. And later still, in the park, we see the Jogger too. Partially, it's simply fun to use familiar faces throughout. But we were also very consciously trying to parallel and bookend Hunter's Moon with events from Awakening in particular and other early episodes.

There's some fun stuff in this sequence. The gargoyles really attempt to scare the gangsters straight by hanging them OUTSIDE the subway train. And as usual, the victims are more frightened of the Gargs than of the robbers...

Brooklyn: "We stil got a little P.R. problem." (All quotations approximate.)

(Still. Honestly. SPREAD THE WORD!!!)

I didn't like how when the crowd exited the subway how they all spoke ONE AT A TIME! That was supposed to play as more general overlapping walla. Oh, well.

Matt's response is a neat little wink. Now that he knows about the Gargs and is there friend, which provides us with some nice balance... and helps set up the status quo.

Elisa: [I had some help from a few] "concerned citizens with wings."

And that was the idea behind this opening sequence. To establish the status quo. Life in Manhattan is far from perfect. I mean guys with particle beam weapons are mugging people on the subway. But Elisa, Matt and the Gargoyles seem to have things in hand. Brooklyn is even injured, but it's all pretty minor. The sun'll fix that. It's "the concrete cure-all". Yep, the gargoyles are there, "stopping evil stone cold" (one of the taglines from our commercials reprised here). Heck, Broadway's even got an appetite joke in here, a bit we haven't really played with him since season one.

Life is good.

CHANGE HAPPENS
So immediately, after this nearly bucolic bit of action and complacency, we muck things up. Chavez temporarily puts Elisa on dayshift with a new partner. Elisa protests that the Captain is "breaking up a good team [her and Matt]. Better than you know [her and Goliath]." But that's not the scary bit. The scary bit is that Elisa stops protesting when she gets a gander at her new partner Jason Conover. Holy Gargoyles, Batman! She's smitten. Matt sees it right away and smiles. And if I might jump ahead quickly, Goliath sees it too -- but he's not smiling. He comments innocently enough that Elisa seems impressed with her new partner. And Elisa fumfers out a response, backtracking and full of guilt. Because she knows that on some level that she's attracted to Jason. And she knows that on some level that means she's cheating (or at least contemplating cheating) on Goliath. At least emotionally, since technically, she and Goliath are not in a relationship. Goliath wasn't bothered by her praise of Jason's shooting. But the moment she goes all girly and denially (can that be a word briefly?), he groks the truth. It's her flustered response that makes him jealous.

JASON CONOVER
But let's backtrack to Jason himself. There's a note somewhere that we wanted Jason to be as much like a human Goliath as possible. I don't know if that comes across at all. But he is heroic and he does have a deep voice. My daughter Erin hated him immediately, as she vaguely recalls him kissing Elisa later. [It's been years and years since she's seen Hunter's Moon.] She knows -- or thinks she knows -- that Jason is a bad guy. I am curious. In his first scenes with Elisa, did EVERYONE know or guess Jason was a villain? Or does that matter less on a show like ours, where the villains are complex and interesting? Were you trying to guess even or just going along for the ride?

Jason is evasive. But I like some of the exchanges that he shares with Elisa.

Elisa: "More than a job. A way of life." is a nice line. Plus references to Sondheim ("Sunday in the Park with dirtbags"), Bonnie & Clyde are fun. (Then later Xanatos gives us a Mr. Rogers ref too: "Can you say harrassment. I knew that you could.") I love how diverse our reference set on this series always was.

During the car chase, Benny kept demanding that the cops "Shoot a tire out. That's all you have to do." I was prepared to say it's not that easy, but since of course that's exactly what Jason did, I held my tongue.

THE NIGHTSTONE TEAM
And we intro another new castmember. Robyn, who comes across as another of our efficient assistant types. Like a female Owen. Her interactions with Dominique are quite fun. All (non-sexual) double entendre. And I love how smooth Dominique is with Robyn, while being vicious to the incoming burglar. (Is this one of the burglars from "The Mirror"?)

And what is D/I-7. Did you believe Xanatos when he said it was only a potent disinfectant? Benny wondered if Demona wanted the D/I-7 to clean herself.

And how about that Destine to Demona transformation? Good one, huh? More anime than usual, I think. It really did seem to hurt. I've been asked whether Demona usually allows her clothing to be destroyed. I think not. My guess is she usually has time to unsuit up before sundown, but the burglar's arrival through off her timing.

ICONS
We did make an effort in this episode -- since we were originally planning it as a direct to video -- to put all the iconic elements of our series in here, before messing with it all. That included having a great turn to stone sequence earlier and a great wake up from stone sequence now. We didn't do it every episode, because we didn't want it to lose its specialness or become stock footage-esque. But once in a while, you need to go for broke on it.

Elisa: "I never get tired of that." Me neither, sister.

WVRN
And now, Jon Carter of Mars. No, wait. Jon Carter of WVRN. I consciously wanted to create identities for ALL three Canmore siblings in the real world. I wanted them to have stuff to do. Roles to play. But I also wanted to both play fair and create some confusion by intro'ing some new characters.

HALF-MOON
It's rare in a gargoyles ep that you see the moon in anything other than her full glory. We cheated here too, as she goes from half to full Hunter's Moon in the course of very few nights. But at least, we tried. Moon subtlety is not our series strong suit.

That night, Hudson, Goliath and Angela return to the scene of the crime. Hudson knows from t.v. that thieves always go there. (TV being the basis of his modern world education.) Angela points out that he's told her (having learned the lesson with the Pack) that TV is also not always to be trusted. But this time he seems right. Or not. It's not the thieves who return, but the Hunters looking for the thieves.

Meanwhile, Brooklyn's leading the Trio & Bronx at the other site. He's a good leader -- except when D's involved. Then his brains melt at the sight of her. "So much for the element of surprise."

That bit where Demona turns up the juice on her weapon to shoot THROUGH the cars is cool. But then we cheat. Brooklyn rips a car door off and uses it as a shield. But we've JUST established that Demona's weapon can now shoot through that. Oh, well. Another screw up. Not the first. Not the last.

Of course, the night is a debacle. Broadway and Bronx receive minor injuries. There's tons of property damage. And Demona escapes with her prize. Brooklyn asks: "Who wants to explain this to Goliath?" The visual joke that follows, where both Lex and BW point at Brook, passes so quickly, I'm not sure if you guys caught it.

SHOCK & AWE
Of course, the night was even worse for Golaith's team as Angela ends the episode on death's door. (Did any of you worry that we might actually kill her off?)

The Hunter tells us that the only good gargoyle is a dead gargoyle. Echoing the prejudice of a thousand generations past. And he may be about to get his wish. But at what price? For he's awakened Goliath's inner vengeance demon here.

We wanted the SHOCKING last line to come from Goliath: "I will hunt them down. And I will KILL them."

Of course, we'd NEVER get away with saying that in today's environment. And it was even a BIG discussion back then. Kudos again to Adrienne Bello for understanding why just this once, it was SO important.

Anyway, that's my ramble. Where's yours?


Bookmark Link

Hunter's Moon memo #2

In anticipation of my Ramble on "Hunter's Moon, Part One," here's the second relavent memo I have. One thing to keep in mind is that I don't have everything from those days. And I certainly don't have electronic copies of everything. So the record I'll present in this and following posts is WAY less than complete. This is just stuff off my computer that I sent to Michael Reaves, but doesn't reflect all the hard work that HE put into things.

Anyway, note the date. This memo was produced in March of 95, months after the one from my previous post. At this time we still thought it was going to be a direct-to-video movie.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

WEISMAN 3-8-95

Notes on "Hunter's Moon" Outline...
Michael, in the interest of getting these notes to you sooner rather than later (and yes, I realize that to a great extent that boat has already sailed) I'm just going to give you a number of broad notes to think about and incorporate into a second draft that may wind up being fairly different from your first draft. I'll toss in a few specifics along the way as they occur to me. Feel free to call me to discuss any aspect of these notes, after you've absorbed all this.

(Incidentally, I noticed that there were a few departures from our final approved premise that seemed to reflect earlier drafts of the premise. I just want to make sure we're working off the same document. Unfortunately, the final premise isn't dated, nor is the draft number listed, so there's no quick way of checking.)

GENERAL STUFF
GOLIATH vs. the HUNTERS
The story seems to be too much about the Hunters (and Elisa) and not enough about our lead GOLIATH. I know this is a particular concern of Gary Krisel's. We need to emphasize that this is Goliath's story, first and foremost. It's about his struggle with feelings of vengeance and how he overcomes those feelings.

We can help drive the story towards Goliath by keeping the Hunters more mysterious for more of the story. If we don't know who they are or why they hate gargoyles until much further along, then Goliath becomes more important.

THE LOVE TRIANGLE
This is another way to keep Goliath's emotions at the forefront of the story. We should really make more of this. Elisa is falling for this new guy Jason. Instead of treating it like she's an unattached female who now has a shot at a new romance, she should feel conflicted, because she's deeply in love with Goliath!! She might sublimate those feelings at times. Even deny them to herself. Because after all, she realizes that her relationship with Goliath is doomed to be platonic. She knows that a future or a family or anything normal is an impossible dream with Goliath, but that doesn't mean that her feelings for him aren't just as real. What does it mean to her when someone else starts to press those buttons? Does Jason remind her of Goliath in some ways? The quiet brooding intensity? The poetic heart? The tragic background that he doesn't like to talk about? His feelings about the importance of family? Or keeping his word? His sense of mission? Jason is in fact a human, but twisted version of Goliath. That realization may sneak up on her, or she may notice it immediately, but she should certainly be conflicted about her feelings for him.

And what of Goliath? Certainly, he'd be "happy" for her. But how does he really feel? Jealous? Frustrated? Lonely? Does his frustration over "losing" Elisa help to fuel his anger and thoughts of vengeance against the Hunters? Then when he thinks she's dead he goes berserk.

And if Jason discovers that Elisa has feelings for Goliath, what's his first response? Revulsion?

Even the other gargoyles would recognize it's a touchy subject. They're not blind to Goliath and Elisa's feelings for each other. Hudson in particular must see how Elisa has replaced Demona in Goliath's heart.

And the fourth side of the triangle: Demona? It's a minor point in this story and God knows we've done it to death in the series, but we shouldn't ignore the dynamics of Goliath and Demona's past relationship. Demona would love the revelation that Elisa's dating a Hunter. It would prove everything she ever believed about Elisa.

I honestly don't know how on the head we should be with it, but obviously, we shouldn't slide over this triangle. It's classic stuff.

DEMONA AND THE VIRUS
If Goliath is the heart of this drama, Demona is definitely the engine. And in general, I think we need more Demona driving this story. We don't have to spell out her plan right away, but we need to involve her more. She was largely absent in this draft and the story felt like it rambled a bit without her. Let's make her evil plot the throughline for the whole story. It should build slowly but steadily. Everything else can sattelite around that.

One problem we have with Demona is that there are two facts of her existence that we are stuck with but which can't be explained by gargoyle-business-as-usual. One is her immortality, which is central to the concept of her opponents the Hunters, and the second is the fact that she turns into a human during the day. We don't want to get into the whole City of Stone/Corsican Bros./Macbeth thing to explain her immortality, nor do we want to have to explain Puck/the Children of Oberon/Titania's Mirror to explain her transformations. And fortunately we don't have to. All we need to do is use the one word "Sorcery" to explain it all.

But "Sorcery" doesn't play a part in the story we have here, so even that one word explanation sticks out for me like a sore thumb, unless we use sorcery as part of her plan with the Virus. I'm reminded of the poison that the Archmage used on Prince Malcolm in "Long Way To Morning", which was "made virulent by a magical spell". I think we can use something along those lines here. If Demona's plan could combine modern science with ancient sorcery it could accomplish a number of goals. For one thing, it introduces sorcery as an element in this world, letting us skate past Demona's transformations and immortality smoothly in a line of dialogue. Secondly, it gives her a long-term plan. Something she could have been working on throughout the centuries as she dodges the Hunters.

For example, I think we should add a flashback in 15th century Florence, where Demona steels some magic spell or talisman and is pursued by a 15th century Hunter armed with da Vinci inspired technology (very high-tech for the time). It could give some scope to the whole project.

Then if we want, for the 1980 Paris Notre Dame scene it's not simply a fight between Demona and Jon Canmore, but Demona is there for a purpose, she's gathering the second ingredient she needs.

Thus by 1996, modern technology has finally caught up with black magic. Demona (in her human identity as Dominique Destin) has her own company, Brimstone Inc. (which she owns with Thailog, though we definitely don't need or want to bring him up here). She can be developing the virus herself. With every intention of using it on an unsuspecting humanity in combination with the magic she stole in the earlier flashbacks. Maybe she needs to wait for the Hunter's Moon to cast her viral spell.

By the way, Demona's threat to release the virus at the end is hardly empty just because Goliath knows she plans to do it anyway. What's to stop her from doing it right there and then? (This raises another question. Would the virus affect Gargoyles? If it did, would Demona care? Would it affect her? Is that why she needs to use magic with it so that she can control who it does or does not kill?)

BARN SCENE
I really think we need to open the whole video with the 994 flashback to Gillecomgain and Demona's initial confrontation in the Scottish barn. We should even exagerate the scene to emphasize the petty way the feud between Hunters and Gargoyles began. Demona doesn't even remember the incident, it was so insignificant. And the Hunters, I believe, should have no idea about the reason the feud began. We tip the audience off at the head. Demona was stealing dried fruit from a barn. A peasant boy tries to catch a thief. Demona lashes out and the boy is scarred for life. The pettiness is a comment on the fruitlessness of revenge and vendetta. Later, when Elisa asks Jason how it all got started, Jason will explain about the Hunter tradition and his father. (We get this Paris flashback out of his conversation with her. Not out of his conversation with his siblings which saves on them having to relate things to each other that all three already know. This also keeps the Hunters more mysterious, for longer.) But the Paris tragedy doesn't begin to answer Elisa's real question. She wants to know how the whole feud got started in the first place. And when Jason realizes that he cannot answer that question, it may be the slow beginning of his realization that life as a Hunter is not the right way to go. The irony will be that even though NONE of our players know how it all got started, the audience does. And it was an incredibly petty conflict to begin such a tragic course.

Another advantage to putting it at the head is that it introduces the idea of Demona. In the current version, Demona never even gets mentioned until she first appears as a human in scene 15.

GOLIATH AND THE HUNTERS
Goliath has no prior knowledge of the Hunters at all. Only Demona does. Remeber, Goliath never saw Macbeth in the Hunter's mask. By the time he arrived at the Macbeth/Demona fight at the end of "City of Stone Part IV", Macbeth had already removed the mask. So we don't need to mention Macbeth in this story at all. In fact we can treat the whole concept of the Hunter as if it is a brand new story element. By using the Gillecomgain barn scene and the Canmore last name, we've given the connection to viewers who've seen City of Stone. They can figure out for themselves how these new hunters fit our episodic mythology. But we don't have to go into that here.

And new viewers won't need any more complicated backstory than what we've presented in our three flashbacks. The barn scene acts as the catalyst for the feud. The Florence scene demonstrates that a Hunter has been hunting Demona throughout the ages. The Paris scene sets up the specific motivation for our three new Hunters. Anything else that regular viewers know about the origins of the hunters and/or Macbeth's use of the mask is just gravy for them, but would be distracting here.

AN OUTRAGEOUS REQUEST
Would you mind terribly if we named Jason's siblings Robyn and Jon and gave the name Charles to their father? This is silly, I know, but by coincidence you chose the names Robin for the sister and Jon for the father. My younger sister is named Robyn and my younger brother is named Jon. If we put a "Y" in Robin's name and we trade the Father and brother's names, then it would be a great kick for my siblings to have sibling Hunters named after them. I realize that seems to identify me with Jason. But think of it this way. You get to horribly paralyze me at the end.

SPEAKING OF JASON, ROBYN AND JON
We need to give Robin/Robyn and Jon/Chas some more screen time to add to the mystery and ultimately to get to know them better. We obviously won't reveal this right away, but when the three Canmore siblings arrive in NYC, each is given a mission. Jason is supposed to infiltrate the precinct where police reports on "gargoyles" have been filed and find out all he can there. (Please keep in mind however, that neither Elisa or Matt are going to admit that they believe the gargoyles exist. They're going to poo-poo it as tabloid stuff. They aren't going to say that gargoyles show up whenever there is trouble.)

I'd suggest that instead of Human Demona infiltrating Gen-U-Tech to get the Virus, we can have Robyn/Robin infiltrate Brimstone Inc. to try and get a bead on Demona and/or what she's up to.

And we need to find something for Jon/Chas to do as well.

Also we probably shouldn't reveal to Elisa early on that Jason has a brother and a sister. That absolutely gives away Jason's identity long before we're ready to be that definitive.

FINAL CONFLICT
We've compressed too much into this final battle. In the premise this was two separate sequences and I think it works much better that way. Jason and Elisa should fall to their deaths before the climactic battle. Goliath must believe that Elisa is dead. (This again heightens his emotional conflict. Makes him more the main character.) Robin/Robyn and Chas/Jon must also believe that Jason is dead. The audience must believe it too, for a while at least. We have some downtime where everyone mourns and swears further vengeance.

In between, after we've mourned the dead but before the final confrontation we might want to reveal the truth. Show Jason and Elisa at the hospital or something. Give us that last revealing Paris flashback. Plant the seeds of doubt. Get him in a wheelchair. Though he's in no condition to go anywhere, he leaves with Elisa pursuing. But is Jason leaving to kill the gargoyles or to reconcile with them?

We might also choose to divide this Elisa/Jason scene in half. Put part of it as a verbal confrontation that comes after Elisa figures out that Jason is the Hunter but before the action sequence where they physically "fall to their deaths". Elisa's asked Jason's some tough questions but he's not prepared to turn over a new leaf yet. Then he goes and gets paralyzed and he's blown his chance to "walk away" clean.

If we do that, we might be able to skip the Hospital scene entirely and thus Jason and Elisa's arrival at the climactic battle in the next paragraph can be a real surprise. (I know, I know, so many options....)

Anyway, in the climactic battle, largely because of Elisa and Jason's "deaths" things have escalated between Gargoyles and Hunters just in time for Demona's final push. At just the right moment, paralyzed Jason and Elisa show up. And Jason has finally learned his lesson. That's enough to calm down Goliath, the gargoyles and Robyn/Robin... but Demona and Chas/Jon are way too far gone. (This also helps explain how Chas/Jon could get so far gone. He had time to freak out about Jason's death. Jason's paralysis doesn't serve to calm him down.) All this at the final crisis point. Chas/Jon and Demona should maybe even "die" here. (An escapable death, but a good one.) We don't want to underestimate the cost of vendettas. Or we can send them both off still swearing vengeance on the other's respective race.

EPILOGUE
I don't know if we should send Jason and Robyn/Robin off at the end. Feels too tidy to me. Maybe events have put distance between Jason and Elisa. Maybe events have brought Goliath and Elisa closer. Or maybe there's still a chance for Jason and Elisa now that the secrets are out. Which leaves Goliath alone. Whichever way we choose to go, I think we should keep Jason around. His need to adjust to his chair and/or try to help/find the AWOL/"Dead" Chas/Jon are not mutually exclusive with him still being a factor in Elisa and the gargoyles' lives.

Also, do we want the gargoyles to plan on moving back to a rebuilt clock tower? Or do we want that era to have past?

A FEW MORE SPECIFICS...
ANGELA
I think you better include her. She'll have been a regular for months by the time this thing comes out.

BRONX
We keep leaving him out. I think we've discovered in the World Tour that he can be useful both in battle and in storytelling. I'm NOT saying we need to drag every gargoyle around in every scene (in fact we should probably find excuses to split them off into teams so that we are dealing with fewer at a time), but we shouldn't artificially disinclude Bronx either.

ELISA ON THE DAYSHIFT
There were some logistical problems caused by Elisa having to be on nightshift with Jason, and in the same night having to interact with the gargoyles. Same with Jason having to play Hunter on the same night he was working with Elisa. If Chavez insists on a temporary reassignment for Elisa, it might actually help us if that reassignment was to the day shift. I'm not mandating this, but it might make it easier.

VARIOUS CRIMES
The mugging is o.k. Since it's purpose is to show status quo. I am a bit concerned about the location and the complete lack of threat that these teams of Muggers provide. Perhaps we should set it somewhere with more gargoyle-access, someplace that doesn't force this woman to first escape on her own. And maybe we should give the muggers (or street gang) the Xanatos/Dracon Particle Beam Weapons to up the stakes a little.

But the other crimes began to feel too random and meandering. I think we should find a way to tie them into our story more directly. Maybe involve them in Demona's plans.

THE CLOCK TOWER
Blowing it up was Gary Krisel's idea, and I'd like to do it. But we've got a logic problem. Jason knows that it's the precinct house. And he knows that most gargoyles turn to stone during the day. If they can track them this easily, and know that they haven't left the tower, why not wait til they turn to stone rather than blow up the police station. If Robyn/Robin is in charge at that moment it might help. Or if they've discovered by this time that Demona doesn't turn to stone at night, they might feel they have no choice. (It's that incredible tracking ability that makes believing the decision tough. Maybe that's what we should get rid of.)

MATT'S FBI BUDDY
Rather not involve him, since for our regular audience he's compromised as a member of the Illuminati.

TRAVIS MARSHALL
Do we want him to get a "good shot" of Demona on video? Maybe, if we really want to blow things wide open. GARGOYLES -- FACT NOT LEGEND! Film at eleven! I don't know if we have room to deal with the ramifications in this story, but it does fit Gary Krisel's mandate to "shake things up." It appeals to me.

SEALAND AMUSEMENT PARK
Just a little nervous about making the climactic battle take place here, given the end location of Batman: Mask of the Phantasm.

AND FINALLY, DEADLINES...
We're really under the gun here. The time I set aside to work on the outline was long past by the time it got turned in. Which means, obviously, that these notes are coming to you VERY LATE. (Sorry about that, I just got bogged down.) So we need another draft fast. I'm hoping that after the second draft, I'll be able to give you just a few cosmetic changes for a polish. And then we'll take that polished draft to Gary Krisel for his notes. And he always has notes. If we're lucky, he'll send us to script with those notes and we won't get too far behind. If we're not lucky, we may be going through a couple outline drafts with him. (And I'll emphasize that I believe it will have a lot more to do with luck than with any skill or talent or lack thereof on our part. Which is not to say he won't have good notes. His notes are generally right on the mark. It's just sometimes he trusts us to execute them. Sometimes he doesn't. And it'll just be luck (good or bad) as to whether we get him on a trustful day or not.)

In any case the first draft script is due before the end of this month on March 22nd. The final draft isn't due until mid-May, but we don't want to eat up April because we'll have to go through the same process on the script as we are on the outline. Only there'll be even more scrutiny because the script is the blue-print, not the plan for the blue-print.

So basically, I'm just urging you to make up for the time that both of us lost on the project. Obviously, you can only do your best, but I felt obligated to point out how far behind we already are.


Bookmark Link

Hunter's Moon Document #1

In anticipation of my Ramble on "Hunter's Moon, Part One," here's the first relavent memo I have. One thing to keep in mind is that I don't have everything from those days. And I certainly don't have electronic copies of everything. So the record I'll present in this and following posts is WAY less than complete. This is just stuff off my computer that I sent to Michael Reaves, but doesn't reflect all the hard work that HE put into things.

Anyway, note the date. This memo was produced in July of 94 (TWELVE YEARS AGO, YIKES!) before the series had even premiered. At the time we thought it was going to be a direct-to-video movie. My boss, Gary Krisel, had rejected CITY OF STONE as a direct to Video because he felt it focused too much on the villains and not enough on the heroes, i.e. Goliath and the Gargoyles. (He was fine with us doing City of Stone as episodes though, so we knew we'd be building off THAT.)

Greg Weisman 7-25-94

NOTES ON HUNTER STORY

Open in @1980.

Father and his three teen-age children: Boy, girl, boy.

He's after "The demon" that his ancestors have been hunting for a thousand years.

His own grandfather died fighting the demon.

His own father spent his whole life searching for the demon.

Now he's found her: Demona.

Oldest son is very gung-ho.
Middle Daughter is more neutral.
Youngest son doesn't like the idea.

Father puts on Hunter's mask and battles Demona. He gets Killed.

All three children now swear vengeance. Oldest son is still the leader.

In present, these three hunters still pursue Demona.

When they stumble upon Goliath and Co. they make no distinction between good and bad gargoyles.

One (or more) of gargoyles is very badly injured. (Though healed during daytime hibernation.)

Goliath swears revenge.

We need to involve Elisa in someway.

Oldest boy is eventually paralized from waist down by Demona.

He and his sister eventually come around to theme that the Price of Revenge is too high. Goliath also gets this message.

Demona and youngest son don't learn.

Probably want to show the original Hunter (Gillecomgain) in a brief flashback or two. Don't contradict anything that's in City of Stone, but don't reveal any details about his fate or who the second or third Hunter's were.

And that's all I've got....


Bookmark Link

Chapter  LXII : "Possession"

Time to ramble...

[Disclaimer: I watched this episode back in January of 2006. So it's been half a year since I've seen it. At the time, I did take a few notes of things I wanted to include in the ramble. So this is what you're getting now. A somewhat abbreviated ramble, as the ep isn't as fresh in my mind as I might like. As with "The Reckoning" ramble, most of what I took down were fun dialogue lines that leapt out at me... (All quotations approximate.)]

Chapter  LXII : "Possession"
Story Editor: Cary Bates
Writer: Cary Bates
Director: Dennis Woodyard

Another one word title, i.e. another one of mine.

FAMILY XANATOS
Xanatos' appearance in this one is brief, but he's still got some great lines...
"Someday you'll thank me for that."
"Wiggle your nose or something." [A BEWITCHED reference.]
"Chin up." (This spoken to Coldstone's detached head.)

Fox has recovered nicely after her pregnancy. She looks great. Have fun, she's told.
Fox: "We always do."

As always I watched the episode with my kids. Erin liked Alex's plush teddy-gargoyle.

GOLIATH THE MAGE
Obviously, Goliath's acting a bit out of character. Did he even sound like himself? And what's with that powder he nails Bronx and Lex with? Plus another clue is that the spell he uses is a rhyming spell rather than Latin. Mortal sorcerers use ancient languages. Only the Children of Oberon use rhymes.

But the key idea is one of volunteering for "Soul Transference 101". Puck-as-Goliath needs Broadway, Angela AND Brooklyn to volunteer -- even if Brooklyn thinks his offer is rejected. Puck is of course teaching Alex-as-Hudson a lesson here. Later, Alex-in-Lex needs Othello, Desdemona and Iago to likewise volunteer. Can't do the soul transference without it.

There's a lot of body-hopping. Illusions. Transference. Possession. Spells. But I think we played pretty fair with the audience. All the clues were there. But kudos to our voice actors, who had to play all sorts of different characters within the framework of their usual voices. It seemed to me if they could keep it straight, then it would help the audience do the same.

COLDSTEEL & ... GOLDFIRE?
As you saw in the memo I posted yesterday, Coldfire's original name was Goldfire. That name and Coldsteel were both mine. Goldfire because she was gold I guess. Cary's first draft of the script kept the Goldfire name too. But at some point it occured to me that Coldfire was much, MUCH cooler.

But WHO designed those robot bodies, huh?! They're dead ringers for Desdemona and Iago. How did Xanatos manage that? There are of course a number of possible explanations. After all, Puck is in the House, right? But perhaps it's no more complicated than the fact that Xanatos saw them both with Othello back in "Vows".

Note that throughout the series, Desdemona is always more honorable than Othello. He seems more compromised in general.

I should acknowledge the debt we owe to Star Trek here. Not "Next Generation", which provided us with voice actors Dorn and Spiner and Frakes. But rather to a specific episode of the Original Series. The Broadway/Angela/Brooklyn possession dynamic was a direct homage to the Kirk/Diana Muldar/Spock dynamic of an episode who's title I'm afraid escapes me at the moment.

Gave us an excuse to give Broadway and Angela a bit of a head start relationship wise too. A kiss...

ALEX
Alex learns his lesson plan. But it was fun watching him-in-Lex dump the real Goliath and Hudson on their heads.

And I liked how Puck/Owen cannot fulfill Xanatos' wishes. But after teaching Alex how, he maneuvers things so that the son gives the father exactly what he wants.

MORE FUN LINES
"Slow but astute."
"My date is coming to."
"By the Dragon, you're me."
"It is a handsome automaton."
"Is that the choice you were leaning toward?"
"Try not to miss me too much."
"I thought you would never grow a conscience"
"I live for subterfuge."

FINALLY...
We wanted that giant pocket watch (or whatever) that Puck pulls out at the end to be a MICKEY MOUSE WATCH... but Disney would just not allow it. They were afraid it would come off as product placement in a kid's show or something. <SIGH>

Anyway, that's my ramble...

Where's yours?


Bookmark Link

Possession Outline Notes

In preparation for my Ramble on "Posession", reprinted here is the 1995 memo I sent to Cary Bates about the outline...

Note that Coldfire's original name was actually "Goldfire". Yuck.

WEISMAN 7-4-95

Notes on Outline formerly known as "Tricksters"...
For starters we need a new title and a new number: 4319-067. "Tricksters" (4319-066) will join "Puck's Macbeth" (4319-052, I believe) in limbo until or unless we get a third season. (I haven't given up on either story.)

This is basically a Coldstone story with Puck as catylist. It's the next step in Coldstone's evolution after "Reawakening", "Legion" and "High Noon". Maybe call it "Possession" or "Possesions". Or "Cross. Double Cross." Or "Triple Cross" or some title-esque thing. I'm not sure.

BEAT SHEET
ACT ONE
1. The Himalayas. Middle of a blizzard. Some mountain climbers or locals are frightened off by a fur covered monster that they mistake for the Yeti or Abominable Snowman. They run off, but suddenly the monster is attacked by Xanatos in his battle armor alongside the Steel Clan Robots, all painted in snow-camouflage white. The monster puts up a fight, and in fact seems to be one heavily-armed Yeti. But he is eventually knocked out and defeated, revealing that he is Coldstone (wearing furs). DISSOLVE TO:

2. Eyrie Building some days later. Xanatos (dressed in a tuxedo) and Owen have Coldstone back in the lab where he was first created. They have deactivated him from the neck down. (Here's a weird thought: maybe they've literally removed his head from off his body.) Coldstone/Othello can hear them, see them and talk to them, but he cannot move or activate his weapons. (But for some reason his sense of smell has been magically enhanced -- no, just kidding.) Owen and Xanatos are talking about solving the Coldstone "problem". (The solution to which seems to involve two sheeted figures, lying semi-prone on tables at the back of the lab. These figures are the "COLDSTEEL" and "GOLDFIRE" robots. More on them later.) Unfortunately for Xanatos, they have not figured out how to accomplish his mysterious goal. The main problem is that Coldstone's creation involved magic, which Xanatos has no access to. Unless, he hints, Owen were to morph into Puck and wiggle his nose or something. But Owen reminds Xanatos that he is forbidden from using his magic except to train Xanatos' son Alexander. Well, Xanatos isn't too upset. He'll figure something out, and in the meantime Coldstone isn't going anywhere. Fox (dressed in an evening gown) appears on a video-intercom. Coldstone may not be going anywhere but they are. And they're going to be late. WIPE TO:

3. Alexander's room. Xanatos and Owen join Fox and Alexander. The new parents have tickets to see Verdi's opera "OTELLO" at the MET. Fox hands the baby over to Owen, giving him babysitter instructions, and Mom and Dad leave for their first night out since Alexander was born. DISSOLVE TO:

4. Eyrie Lab. Goliath and Hudson sneak in, and prepare to reactivate Coldstone. (Note: throughout this scene and the next, Hudson does not speak. Try to make this as unnoticeable as possible.) Confusion as to how Goliath found him is secondary to Coldstone's immediate concern for Goliath and Hudson's safety. Within Coldstone's cyber-mind, the battle continues. (Maybe we dissolve into the cyperscape to get a glimpse of that battle.) Coldstone's love (Desdemona) is trapped in an eternal conflict against Coldstone and Goliath's enemy (Iago). If the evil one should triumph, Goliath would be in grave danger. But that's exactly why Goliath has come. He's been worried about his brother and has studied magical scrolls to find a solution. If Coldstone will return to the clock tower with Goliath, Goliath feels he can end the conflict. Coldstone agrees and Goliath activates him. (Or reattaches his head.) They sneak out.

5. The clocktower. Bronx, Angela and the trio are there watching t.v. or something. They are suprised when Goliath and Hudson arrive. They just left on patrol a half-hour ago. But obviously, when Coldstone steps out of the shadows, everyone's even more surprised to see him. (Maybe Angela realizes that Coldstone is Gabriel's father.) Bronx approaches Goliath and Coldstone, growling low (but who exactly he is growling at is ambiguous). Goliath quickly kneels beside Bronx and calms him. (Only the audience notices the slight sparkle of magic and the glazed way Bronx treads off into a corner and immediately goes to sleep.)

Everyone's got tons of questions, but Goliath doesn't have time for explanations. Iago must be removed from Coldstone's body. The only way to do that is to temporarily empty out all of Coldstone's personalities. Then Othello and Desdemona can be safely returned without Iago. But where will Othello and Desdemona go while this takes place? Goliath reveals they will each have to enter one of us. Angela volunteers. And Broadway does too, before Brooklyn and Lex have a chance. Lex pulls Goliath aside: where'd he learn to do magic? Goliath answers "soothingly" that he studied magic while Avalon sent them around the world. Lex's suspicions magically melt away. Suddenly, he's more impressed by Goliath's new abilities than suspicious of them.

Goliath casts the rhyming (non-latin) spell. Desdemona is transferred into Angela. Othello goes into Broadway. Iago, theoretically, is released into the ether. And the empty Coldstone falls comatose to the floor. Brooklyn seems particularly startled by these events, but he seems to recover quickly. (The reason "Brooklyn" is shocked is because he's really been possessed by Iago. No one else realizes this, and Iago's smart enough to keep his mouth shut.) Othello and Desdemona are pleased that the spell worked. Lex asks if Broadway and Angela are still in there own bodies. Yes, but they will remain dormant until Othello and Des are transferred back into Coldstone. They are ready for that transfer now, but Goliath is tired from his magical exertion. He needs to go off and rest. He asks "Hudson" to go with him, Hudson nods and they depart.

6. We follow Goliath and Hudson. They lands on top of a nearby building (or some cooler location). Goliath morphs into Puck and then transforms Hudson into baby Alex. (That's who it was the whole time. The real Goliath and Hudson ARE out on patrol.) Puck announces that Alex's first magic lesson has officially begun. Welcome to SOUL TRANSFERENCE 101.

ACT TWO
7. Cut to Clock Tower. Without thinking about it, Othello/Broadway and Desdemona/Angela are holding hands as they wait for "Goliath's" return. Iago/Brooklyn notices this and approaches them. He suggests that while Goliath is off recovering, they can take their new bodies out for a spin. Lex (still hazy from Puck/Goliath's magical tampering) isn't sure about this, but "Brooklyn" thinks it will be all right. Soon Othello and Des will be reconfined back in the cyber-prison of the Coldstone body. They might as well enjoy this last chance at flesh-and-blood freedom. Besides, what's the harm? Oth/Bway and Des/Ang have to admit they wouldn't mind feeling the wind against their faces one last time. They take off for one last flight. As Iago/Brooklyn moves to follow them, Lex stops him. Neither notice that behind them, a flash of magic (Puck) enters the prone body of Coldstone. Lex feels they should wait for Goliath. So "Brooklyn" instructs Lex to stay behind and do just that. "Brooklyn" will follow the "love-birds" -- to make sure they stay out of trouble. He leaves. Lex watches him go. And suddenly, behind Lex, Coldstone looms threateningly.

8. We follow Des/Ang and Oth/Bway on a romantic flight through the city. It's glorious. Othello and Des are almost literally drunk with the sensation of being alive again in Broadway and Angela's bodies. They land on the Chrysler building (or wherever). Oth/Bway marvels at the simplest pleasures. The touch of Des/Ang's flesh and blood hand. The softness of her hair. Until now he had not realized how Coldstone's cyborg sensors and reanimated stone skin has dulled his senses. Des/Ang also appreciates the reality of true sensation over the electric illusion of life on the cyberscape. Brooklyn steps out of the shadows. And like a devil in their ears, subtly reemphasizes to them that the prospect of returning to Coldstone is a fairly grim notion. Too bad, he sympathizes, that there's no way they could keep the bodies they're in. Oth/Bway and Des/Ang exchange a guilty look. But the wheels are turning.

9. Back at the clock tower, the real Goliath and Hudson return home. Coldstone is there, very glad to see them. (No immediate sign of Lex or Bronx.) Goliath is glad to see his brother but both gargoyles are naturally cautious. They can't be sure which personality is in control. Almost on cue, Bronx comes treading out of the darkness, and behaves in a friendly manner toward Coldstone. That's good enough for Goliath and Hudson: Bronx has a sixth sense about this kind of stuff. If he trusts Coldstone, then the right personality must be in control. (What neither Goliath or Hudson notice is that when Bronx's "work" is done, he trudges blankly back into the shadows and plops down to sleep next to a bound and gagged Lexington. Bronx is still under Puck's spell.) "Coldstone" tells the gargoyles that Xanatos is plotting against them again. He's created new monsters that must be destroyed before they can be used against them. Goliath expresses disappointment but not surprise. Xanatos had called a truce between them, saying that he owed Goliath and the clan for helping to save Alexander. Obviously, Xanatos' version of debt is a little different than Goliath's. Golaith, Hudson and "Coldstone" depart for the Eyrie Building.

10. Oth/Bway, Des/Ang and "Brooklyn" return to the clock tower and find Lex tied up tight with steel cables. What happened? Coldstone jumped him. Obviously, Goliath's spell didn't succeed in forcing Iago out of the Coldstone body. He's got control and he's tricked Goliath and Hudson into launching an attack against Xanatos, destroying their truce. At first, "Brooklyn" protests that this is impossible. But when everyone turns to ask him why, he fumfers and covers quickly. Whatever has happened, Brooklyn says, the choice is clear. They have to destroy the Coldstone body. It's the only way to protect the world from Iago's evil. Lex is horrified -- moral qualms aside -- what would happen to Othello and Desdemona? What would happen to Broadway and Angela? Oth/Bway speaks up. Brooklyn is right. They have a chance to destroy Iago once and for all. Nothing else matters. Oth/Bway, Des/Ang and "Brooklyn" take off after Coldstone. Lex follows reluctantly.

11. Eyrie lab. "Coldstone" leads Goliath and Hudson. He pulls the sheets off the two covered figures to reveal two new robots: COLDSTEEL and GOLDFIRE. (Coldsteel is made of blue steel and modeled after Iago -- very powerful and dangerous, a fitting opponent for Coldstone. Goldfire is gold in appearance and modeled after Desdemona -- beautiful in a cold, art decco fashion, she is a fitting companion for Coldstone. Both have the usual built-in weapons. Plus Goldfire has built-in flame-throwers.) The resemblence to Coldstone's lover and foe are not lost on Goliath, and while he and Hudson question the situation, they do not notice "Coldstone" picking up a remote control devise and hooking it directly into his cyborg body. He uses the device to activate the two automatons and then uses them to take down Goliath and Hudson. (There's no other action in this act, so make this a big battle sequence ending in the defeat of our two heroes.)

ACT THREE
12. Oth/Bway, Des/Ang, Iago/Brook and a very confused Lex are about to come in for a landing at the seemingly quiet castle. Oth/Bway suggests splitting up to look for their enemy. Brooklyn agrees. Othello and Des can check the Great Hall, Lex and Brook will check the lab. As Oth/Bway and Des/Ang head off in one direction, we follow Lex and Brooklyn to the lab.

13. No one is in the lab, but there are clear signs of a struggle. Lex is pretty upset. He feels like he's coming out of a haze. A whole bunch of stuff makes no sense. Why wouldn't Goliath mention he had studied magic before now? Why were he and Hudson surprised to see Coldstone when they returned to the clocktower? And how can they even think about destroying Coldstone's body while Othello and Desdemona are still possessing Bway and Angela? Brooklyn thinks he has an answer. He slams Lex hard.

14. Othello/Bway and Des/Angela search the Great Hall. Des/Ang questions what they are going to do. Oth/Bway tries to make it sound like they have no choice. Iago must be destroyed, and the only way to do that is to destroy Coldstone. But, she protests, if they destroy Coldstone, they'll be trapped in Bway and Angela's bodies forever. Would that be so bad? he asks. After all they've been through, don't they deserve a real flesh and blood existence again? Des/Ang isn't saying yes. But she isn't saying no either.

15. Back in the lab with Lex and "Brooklyn". Lex is just regaining consciousness and he's pretty upset about being jumped and trussed up twice in one night. "Brooklyn" has Lex on the "table" where Coldstone was created. He's attaching electrodes to Lex (or some other high-tech deathtrap, that "Brooklyn" would never be blamed for). As he does this, he reveals to Lex and our audience that he is Iago. He likes Brooklyn's body and has no intention of surrendering it. Not to go back to the hellish Coldstone cyberscape, and certainly not to be bannished into nothingness. He doesn't know how Coldstone woke up again, but it's a marvelous opportunity. He and the gargoyles will destroy the Coldstone body and if by some "accident" Othello/Bway is also destroyed during the battle, then "Brooklyn" will have no choice but to console a grieving Desdemona/Angela. Eventually, he will use his position as Goliath's right hand to destroy Goliath as well and rule the clan. He thinks it's a pretty good plan, activates the deathtrap and leaves. Lex is in considerable pain, but just when it looks like curtains, a magical sparkle enters Lex via his mouth. Suddenly, Lex stops screaming, smiles and magically breaks free.

16. Oth/Bway and Des/Ang have found their way down to the Atrium beneath the castle. There they find Goliath and Hudson, trussed up. They go to help, but it's a trap. Coldstone attacks and he's winning. Iago/Brooklyn shows up and the tide starts to turn against Coldstone, but then Iago/Brook does something that allows Coldstone to get the drop on Oth/Bway. It's looking like Iago's plan is going to work, when Coldstone cybernetically summons Coldsteel and Goldfire, and uses them to trash Iago/Brook and Des/Ang respectively. Coldstone now has the upper hand and explains (while fighting) that Xanatos created these robots as a gift to Goliath. In payment for saving his son Alexander, Xanatos wanted to find a cure for Goliath's brother's multiple personality disorder. What no one counted on is that Coldstone had developed a personality of its own. Now Coldstone will use the robots to destroy all three of the former Coldstone personas so that they can't return to take the Coldstone body back. "Brooklyn" protests that he's not one of them, but Coldstone skoffs. Coldstone can sense that Brooklyn's body is possessed by Iago, and Coldstone is determined to destroy Iago. It looks like curtains for Iago, Othello, Desdemona (and thus Brooklyn, Broadway and Angela as well), when Lex swoops in and slams Coldstone back. While Coldstone is recovering, Lex (who never says a word) frees Hudson and Goliath. Now all our gargoyles (including Iago/Brooklyn) battle Coldstone and the robots. The good guys win.

After the smoke clears, Goliath and Hudson turn to face Iago/Brooklyn. (Lex is still strangely silent. And Oth/Bway and Des/Ang are too ashamed of their own desires to be too self-righteous towards Iago/Brook.) They want Iago to abandon Brooklyn's body. Iago/Brooklyn says fat chance. He's never returning to cyberspace, and he sure isn't going to voluntarily banish himself to nothingness. He does express some regret and wishes outloud that Xanatos' plan had worked out. The powerful Coldsteel robot body is clearly superior to the gargoyle teen-ager he now inhabits. Hearing this, Coldstone asks Iago/Brook if that is really what Iago wants? Why, yes. Can Coldstone transfer him? Coldstone says he can't, but Lexington can. Lexington steps forward. With a little prompting help from Coldstone (Puck) he recites the magical rhyme from Act One (the only words he's spoken in this scene) and transfers Iago out of Brooklyn and into Coldsteel. Brooklyn, the real Brooklyn, stands there very confused. But Coldsteel/Iago laughs at the fools who would give him such power. Goliath, Hudson and Coldstone move toward him, and clearly outnumbered, Iago/Coldsteel flees to fight another day.

Once Iago/Coldsteel is gone. Puck magically removes himself from the Coldstone body, leaving it empty and comatoast. Goliath wasn't expecting Puck, but in retrospect is hardly surprised. "Why all the subterfuge?" he asks. Well, in the first place, Puck lives for subterfuge. And in the second place it was necessary. Puck explains that what he had told them about Xanatos wanting to repay his debt to Goliath was true, though obviously the bit about Coldstone developing its own personality was a little elaboration, creatively added to convince Iago to voluntarily enter the Coldsteel robot. Magical soul transfers are tricky business and generally require the cooperation of the subject. Now if they're ready Othello and Des can be transferred as well. There's a moment of hesitation on their part. Will they trade flesh & blood lives for stone & metal casings. But they know they cannot steal Broadway and Angela's bodies permanently. Othello and Des share one last embrace. Lex again casts his spell (this time with more confidence) and after the transfer is completed, Broadway and Angela regain consciousness in mid-grope. There's a nice awkward moment that should help set up any future romance for these two. Coldstone/Othello and Goldfire/Des thank Bway and Ang for the use of their bodies. Goliath invites them back to the clock tower, but they feel they must pursue Coldsteel. He's still a threat and he's still their responsibility. But when that threat is ended, they will return. They depart. Our gargoyles turn to thank Puck for the magic he wrought and ask why he has been working through Lexington? Puck replies that although he set the ball rolling, this last magic wasn't his, and that this Lexington is not exactly who he appears to be. Magical sparks fly out of Lex's mouth and coalesce in Puck's arms to reveal baby Alex. Puck praises Alex for being a good student, and himself for being a good teacher. Alex smiles, yawns and falls asleep. Lex awakens to himself almost as confused as Brooklyn, Broadway and Angela. Goliath promises to explain and the group heads for home.

Suddenly, Puck pulls a giant watch from a very small pocket. "Look at the time," he cries. And vanishes.

17. Alex's room. Puck and Alex materialize. Puck puts Alex in his crib and transforms back into Owen just as Xanatos and Fox return home from the opera. Was Alex any problem, Fox asks. No, Owen replies. He's a very well-behaved and intelligent child. Owen turns to Xanatos and tells him that the Coldstone problem has been solved. A bit surprised, Xanatos thanks Owen. Owen demurs. "Don't thank me, sir. Thank your son." A bit confused, Xanatos looks into the crib where his son sleeps and smiles.

GENERAL NOTES FOR THE ABOVE:
Keep the talky scenes as brief as possible. Just get the point across. Give the most space to action sequences: the act one Coldstone vs. Xanatos fight in the Himalayas; the act two Goliath & Hudson vs. Coldsteel & Goldfire fight at the castle; the act three mega-battle in the Atrium.

Also, milk the transformation scenes. Particularly the act one scene where Puck/Goliath transfers the souls of Othello and Desdemona into the bodies of Broadway and Angela. And the act three scenes where Lex/Alex transfers Iago, Othello and Des into Coldsteel, Coldstone and Goldfire.

Don't forget that the names Othello, Desdemona and Iago are for our designation only. They should not appear in spoken dialogue at all.

Any script dealing with Coldstone, Puck and magical possession is bound to be confusing. Lots of people in other people's bodies. And a few illusions from Puck as well. Let's go out of our way to make it clear in the script both whose body we are seeing visually (and thus whose voice we are hearing), and who's mind is actually controlling that body (and voice). Remember, we're not trying to keep any secrets from the storyboard artists. However, we are trying to keep secrets from the audience, so don't hesitate to spell things out in description and then explicitly state that the audience shouldn't be able to figure this out yet.

Consistency is key. I think in order to best describe who's who, the best designation for dialogue headings and description may be to put the body's name first, followed by the possessor's name in parenthesis. As follows:

COLDSTONE (OTHELLO) - Coldstone with Othello's personality in control.
GOLIATH (PUCK) - Puck magically disguised as Goliath.
HUDSON (ALEXANDER) - Alexander magically disguised as Hudson.
BROADWAY (OTHELLO) - Othello in possession of Broadway's body.
ANGELA (DESDEMONA) - Desdemona in possesion of Angela's body.
BROOKLYN (IAGO) - Iago in possession of Brooklyn's body.
COLDSTONE (PUCK) - Puck in possesion of Coldstone's body.
LEXINGTON (ALEXANDER) - Alexander in possession of Lex's body.
COLDSTEEL (IAGO) - Iago in control of the Coldsteel robot.
GOLDFIRE (DESDEMONA) - Desdemona in control of the Goldfire robot.

THE THEME here is HONOR. Xanatos is trying to honor a debt he owes Goliath. Coldstone and Desdemona are torn between their desires and the honorable thing to do, the honorable sacrifice to make. Iago demonstrates no honor and is a negative example, but even Puck shows honor. He is trying to serve his master Xanatos without breaking any rules. He's very true to that code. Emphasize the theme as much as possible.

NOTES ON MOTIVATIONS:
XANATOS -- He's barely in this story, but his initial plan starts the whole ball rolling. Though he's in no particular hurry, he is -- in his own way -- actually trying to do a good deed for a change. He feels he owes Goliath for saving his son in "Gathering Part 2". He wants to return the favor by reuniting Goliath with his brother Coldstone. And he wants to help Coldstone out by creating new bodies for the Iago and Desdemona personalities, thus freeing Othello from his pseudo-schizoid condition. When we open, he's already had the Coldsteel and Goldfire robot bodies built. The inner workings are basic Steel Clan, but the robots have no artificial intelligence programming, which would allow the Iago and Desdemona personalities full control if Xanatos could figure out how to make the soul transfer.

PUCK/OWEN - He'd like to help Xanatos out, but is forbidden from using his magic that directly. So he's set up this elaborate "trick" in order to accomplish two things. One is getting Iago, Desdemona and Othello to voluntarily enter Coldsteel, Goldfire and Coldstone respectively. Two is training the infant Alexander in the art of "Soul Transfer and Exchanges". Both are necessary conditions to accomplishing his goal. So Puck demonstrates how Soul Transfers are done in Act One, but leaves it for Alex to do the magic in Act Three that would actually satisfy Xanatos' intentions.

IAGO - Initially, Iago wants to keep the Brooklyn body, if possible, without revealing that he's taken it. When Puck possesses Coldstone, Iago sees it as an opportunity. He's planted the seeds of dissatisfaction in Othello and Desdemona. He feels if they destroy Coldstone, they'd get to keep these new young bodies. And he's seducing them with both carrot and stick to make that choice. If he can kill Othello and/or Goliath in the process, all the better. He still lusts after Desdemona and wouldn't mind fooling her into "Brooklyn's" arms after Othello was out of the way.

It's important, however, to see Iago's goals change during the final battle. We need to demonstrate that he is frustrated by how much less powerful the Brooklyn body is when compared to the Coldsteel robot. We need to believe that he would willingly give up Brooklyn to live in a robot. (You might even try to hint that vanity played a part in his decision, at least subconsciously. After all, Coldsteel has been designed to look like Iago. That may impress him almost as much as the robot's power.)

OTHELLO & DESDEMONA - Are almost literally drunk with the sensation of being alive again in Broadway and Angela's bodies. Otherwise, they'd never consider what they in fact do briefly consider here, which is keeping bodies that don't belong to them. Ultimately, they realize how wrong that is and willingly give the gargoyle bodies up. Othello returns to Coldstone. Desdemona takes possession of Goldfire.


Bookmark Link

GOOD NEWS!

As many of you already know, the first issue of the new GARGOYLES comic book sold out its print run. There WILL be a second printing... and all the fans who bought copies and/or SPREAD THE WORD deserve a round of applause...

<CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP>

But please, let's not use this as an excuse to be complacent. We now need to sell out this second printing and encourage pre-orders on issue #2. Not to mention the two DVD sets.

This is NOT me asking people who've already bought the book to buy additional copies. This IS me asking people to continue to spread the word. (I can't tell you how many garg fans I just met in Minnesota, who had no idea that the comic was even out.) Contact the ELFQUEST fandom, the STAR TREK fandom the FILL-IN-THE-BLANK fandom. Contact local comic shops. Contact local conventions. Contact any community that might be interested.

Keep the good news rolling in...

SPREAD THE WORD!!!!


Bookmark Link

CONvergence

Just got back from CONvergence in Minnesota. I had a great time at the convention. Met a bunch of new Gargoyles fans, signed comic books, dvds and posters and read "BLATHER" as the secret ingredient for their Iron Artist competition. FYI, "Blather" can be found at...

http://www.s8.org/gargoyles/askgreg/search.php?rid=469

Of course, I did a panel on Gargoyles, but I also had fun doing panels on writing characters, on writing subtext, on DC Comics characters in animation, on creating cartoons that aren't just for kids, on how fans can revive dead properties and even on Veronica Mars.

It's a great con. So check out their website at:

http://www.convergence-con.org/

I'd like to give particular thanks to Chris Jones, who brought me into the Convergence fold. Chris was the penciller on the Captain Atom/JLE/Gargoyles parody story ("The Flashback of Notre Dame") that I did for DC Comics all those years ago. It was great to finally meet him in person.

Special thanks also to Perrin Klumpp, their guest guru and to guest liason Mark Tempel, for putting up with me all weekend and to guest liason Lex Larson, who picked me up at the airport and hung out with Mark and I when she could.

I also had a great time with fellow guests Bridget Landry and Ken Hite and the rest.

Thanks also to Windy, Tim, Pat, Ishmael, Jeremy, Melissa, Melissa, Mandy, Anton, Jenni, Amanda, Eryn and everyone else who made it such a great experience.

WOW! Two great cons in a row. I'll be at the San Diego ComicCon in a couple weeks, but there's almost no way that monstrosity could ever be as much fun as the Gathering and Convergence combined.

Finally, I'm now in love with Jucy Lucy. And Soylent Theater is People.



: « First : « 1000 : « 100 : « 10 : Displaying #1109 - #1118 of 1466 records. : 10 » : 100 » : Last » :